Girls quitting (2016's)

[slingnit]

For most players it transcends a love for the game to play a sport in college, it takes a love of the grind. A love of pushing yourself off season, a love of a highly regimented schedule, a love of pushing your body to become stronger and faster, a love of the sport (not just playing the sport). I can understand in great players not wanting to play in college, it takes a lot.

And for some it is just the act of doing what they have always done. Love, like or hate it, it has been their life for 10-12 years and they know nothing else. But once it is gone they do not know how to adapt to life outside of softball or whichever sport they play. So they just hang on to it as long as they. Some go into coaching for that exact reason.

 

[Cannonball]

First, it is not just softball but every competitive environment. In my area, we see it a lot in both boy's and girl's soccer. I think it is a combination of things and is not as simple as saying burn out. For example the point about the car is valid. That is a HS student's first real freedom and they want to run with it. Some players just can't meet the challenges of competition day in and day out and so, look for a way out. That isn't to say that they don't love the game. When I was coaching basketball and under tremendous pressure to win, I would sit on the bus for those long road games and say to myself, "I don't think I am going to die tonight." After the game, I just could not let go of the mistakes my players and I made. I'd make lists that had to be covered the next day in practice. I made notes to file on each coach and their moves. I would watch film endlessly because I didn't want to let my kids down and get caught off guard by something. I loved the game and loved coaching the kids but the pressure to win was overwhelming. People were shocked when I walked away. Kids get the same way. They want to please the most important people in their lives, their parents and often feel like they have let their parents down.

My dd and I watched the same trend back in the day and at every level. Our dds that continue have entered competition that is not for the faint of heart. It is not for everyone and should not be. It is competition and most of our dds thrive on it. It will be those same qualities that will serve our dds well in life.

One last story. I coach a very talented young lady in girl's golf but I can't get her to believe in herself and realize just how talented she is. This is her senior year. Today, we played in the rain on a very tough course of which my players have never set eyes on. At one point, it was more storm than rain. Still, somehow this young lady scored well today. In talking to her again, I asked her if she wanted me to find a college for her to play at. I could easily do so. She told me that her goal was HS golf and that she had achieved what she set out to do. She has other dreams and ambitions after HS. I admire her and have to let that be enough even when I think about the talent she is wasting. It is not my life. She has a plan for her life!

 

[dbronstein]

It is remarkably hard to find a balanced semi-commitment the way sports are set up in this country. Either you are going elite all the way or you are not - which is a problem when you don't want to make it 'your life' - and even if you do it is only going to last until you are 23 or so. It is also hard when your personal 'elite' level may not be that high.

Right. I also don't like that rec sports pretty much disappear at high school ages. I played baseball and soccer growing up, but I wasn't a good athlete and I couldn't make my HS teams, so I was done after 8th grade. There wasn't any place I could play. Today, there's TB/club teams, but those are more competitive than the HS teams. My DD loves softball, but she just plays rec. She's in 7th grade now and I don't want to push her too much because she doesn't respond to it very well, but I want her to get good enough to be able to play in HS. If she can't make the HS team, there's no place else for her to play. I have no illusions of her being a superstar or anything, I just know how much she loves softball and how disappointed she'll be if she's not able to play at that point.

 

[JAD]

To answer your question as to why people would want to play: Because our HS is very competitive. It's a little more relaxed than spring season and fun for the girls. It gives the kids a chance to play together and shake down things before spring. It gives the normal bench players a chance to get in the game and sharpen their skills. And lastly, because all players have to per coach.

Competitive is a relative term. HS teams in GA would not be very competitive vs. the A-level TB teams, which is why we do not play a lot of HS ball out of season.

 

[cuzmail]

Competitive is a relative term. HS teams in GA would not be very competitive vs. the A-level TB teams, which is why we do not play a lot of HS ball out of season.

Generally speaking you are correct.

In this case I am referring to the term competitive in the same sense as you. The fall ball HS (varsity) teams in our area have enough TB players on them to make them competitive.

Sorry to hear that your area doesn't have the level of HS ball to make it interesting.

 

[JAD]

Generally speaking you are correct.

In this case I am referring to the term competitive in the same sense as you. The fall ball HS (varsity) teams in our area have enough TB players on them to make them competitive.

Sorry to hear that your area doesn't have the level of HS ball to make it interesting.

I think the problem we have is that the TB is so competitive. A-level TB teams will have players from across the state and several have players from neighboring states. It is hard for a HS team using only players districted for their school to compete with that. Most HS coaches recognize that the best way for their top players to get better is to play against better competition, and most HS teams are a combination of A, B, C and REC league players.

 

[cuzmail]

and most HS teams are a combination of A, B, C and REC league players.

There's our difference right there ^^^. Not usually the case around here. Very few rec players. Mostly Gold, A, and B.


I would say TB is nationally competitive here in Texas too, so you have those same TB players in mass playing HS ball. Makes it interesting.

 

[Orange Socks]

There's our difference right there ^^^. Not usually the case around here. Very few rec players. Mostly Gold, A, and B.


I would say TB is nationally competitive here in Texas too, so you have those same TB players in mass playing HS ball. Makes it interesting.

Let me say that not all high school softball programs are created equally. My DD's HS team will be lucky to have 4-5 TB players on it, including one (2016) who I just found out turned in her TB team uniform. She doesn't want to play in college. There are some schools that will have 60 girls tryout and many of those kids play high level softball. Their JV teams will be able to beat most V teams here. They also have a good feeder system of TB teams. Private Schools have the advantage of pulling from anywhere. There is a private school coach that keeps in contact with me always looking to recruit kids to her softball program...ahem school. I would even consider it, if we didn't have to pay.

But many more schools are similar to my DD's program. They will never have sniff at the playoffs, due to their very strong district foes year in year out.

Unfortunately, DD's school won't be able to do fall ball this year since the fields that they play at decided to not renew the agreement, with the "league." But I'm okay with that since she is involved in Basketball, Theatre Arts, hitting/catching lessons and her TB team. Oh and don't forget school work.

 

[PA SB Dad]

You have to keep in mind that you will get a skewed view of playing in college on this site because many members have DD's who have successfully navigated all of the potential obstacles to play college softball. As CB said, it is not for the faint of heart. At the beginning of the season last year, every player on my 14U team told me they had a goal of playing in college, and every parent wanted that for their DD's. We set the bar high, practiced with our Gold team, brought in the Gold coaches and former college players to work with them, and emphasized the importance of training outside of team practices to improve and be able to compete for playing time. We played very good teams in A level tournaments and showcases where they got to see what kind of players and teams they are competing against when it comes to recruiting and playing college ball. It was an eye-opening experience for them. In the end, of the 9 players who aged up, 2 players made the Gold team, two players went on to the 18U Showcase team, one went to another Gold team in another organization, and 4 decided the commitment was not worth it. My personal view is that I saved those 4 families a boat-load of money pursuing a goal that was out of their reach.

When you are doing this for a while, you realize almost all of the girls who say they want to play in college like the idea of playing college softball, but it is a dream, not a real goal. Once they get to a point when push comes to shove, many will choose not to pursue it. The same is true in many many sports. I think there is a certain lack of humility when players and parents say their goal is to play in college when they have no idea how much work and sacrifice it takes to achieve that goal. Not everyone can, or should. That is why it is such a great accomplishment when someone does make it! It is not a funnel where everyone eventually makes it through. It is a pyramid where only the select few make it to the top.

 

[maksoftball]

Let me say that not all high school softball programs are created equally. My DD's HS team will be lucky to have 4-5 TB players on it, including one (2016) who I just found out turned in her TB team uniform. She doesn't want to play in college. There are some schools that will have 60 girls tryout and many of those kids play high level softball. Their JV teams will be able to beat most V teams here. They also have a good feeder system of TB teams. Private Schools have the advantage of pulling from anywhere. There is a private school coach that keeps in contact with me always looking to recruit kids to her softball program...ahem school. I would even consider it, if we didn't have to pay.

But many more schools are similar to my DD's program. They will never have sniff at the playoffs, due to their very strong district foes year in year out.

Unfortunately, DD's school won't be able to do fall ball this year since the fields that they play at decided to not renew the agreement, with the "league." But I'm okay with that since she is involved in Basketball, Theatre Arts, hitting/catching lessons and her TB team. Oh and don't forget school work.

Yes. Same here. While we do have a lot of TB players (and most of them make Varsity), we still have a handful of TB that do not make Varsity...the rest are rec ball players or past players no longer playing TB. DD sees it being more watered down for sure...she has the biggest class of TB players (2017)...counting both Varsity and JV, only 6 or 7 play TB...but most are playing at the B or C level. We have one athlete on Varsity that does not play TB at all, but she is an incredible athlete that has made plays/hits that make me double take the fact that she doesn't play TB!

Anyway, I agree that it depends on the HS/district. There are a couple of high schools in our district that probably only have less than 3-4 TB players in their entire school. Makes for weak competition but on bright side, we make playoffs because of them. Sad but true LOL.