Researching players or parents

[WARRIORMIKE]

So on the reverse

What about with coaches and organizations?? How much info do you accumulate before you decide to check out a program??

 

[Easton33]

"Who do some of you people think you are?".... that's pretty funny....sounds like you spend alot of time on FB....

No facebook, no social media at all. If people want me to know something about them, they'll tell me or someone else will but I take people for how and who they present themselves to be and go from there.

 

[Amy in AZ.]

About Instagram. You can still screen shot that pic and have a copy of it.

I find that kids that still post on FB are posting about the water park, movies, etc. Hopefully, the days of pics at the kegger are over with. It was ridiculous what they were posting, when it first was popular, though.

 

[T.J.]

Totally different situation Mike....Travel Ball (or any league) you are investing time & money and you want to make sure there is a return on these investments for your kids....and the best return possible (playing time, playing position, development, proper environment, social life, etc.). So when it comes to coaches and organizations, IMO, knowledge is power. The more you know about where and who you are sending your kids to, the better off you will be. So yeah, by all means...scout the team yourself, chit chat with some parents, ask around your network of softball colleagues, research the history of the team (are they successful? are the numbers going down or up? fees? travel limits? etc.), do a google search on the coaches. Its kind of like a buyer beware...so do your homework.

Hope this answers your question (LOL).

T J

So on the reverse

What about with coaches and organizations?? How much info do you accumulate before you decide to check out a program??

 

[Pdiddy]

No facebook, no social media at all. If people want me to know something about them, they'll tell me or someone else will but I take people for how and who they present themselves to be and go from there.

really?...what if your DD was hanging out at a new friends house and then it was brought to your attention that her mother was in porn movies not to long ago.....she was nice and everything, but you obviously wouldn't have a problem with her past....Us peoples point is that we would.... and the fact there may be a good chance it would affect someone....it's not much different than "out of hand" social media issues....that's why every university and professional sports team have policies about what you post and tweet....

 

[Easton33]

really?...what if your DD was hanging out at a new friends house and then it was brought to your attention that her mother was in porn movies not to long ago.....she was nice and everything, but you obviously wouldn't have a problem with her past....Us peoples point is that we would.... and the fact there may be a good chance it would affect someone....it's not much different than "out of hand" social media issues....that's why every university and professional sports team have policies about what you post and tweet....

Poor parenting skills would allow you to let your DD spend the night with strangers. Fortunately I am not lacking in those skills, I will KNOW the child and parents well before I entertain the thought of letting one of my four kids to spend the night off. Another problem with your justification is, serial killers, molesters and so forth don't post their exploits on Facebook. Get to know the person/people before you judge who they are.

 

[coach james]

Wow! So, now a coach looks on facebook to decide who gets to play? On field behavior, athletism, and desire to be the best is what should dictate who plays. Who do some of you people think you are? You are judging kids based on their parents and their friends. If you feel guilty about doing it then you know it is wrong, if you don't feel guilty, you should. Kids do dumb things, we did when we were their age. The difference is we have social media and other avenues so nothing happens without everyone knowing about it. The most perfect part about the game is that the game doesn't care who you are, who your parents are, how much money you have, or any other social/economical identifiers. It's how you play the game. Coaches can inspire at risk youths and mentor them and they should! Not turn them away because their second cousin is a friend on facebook and she has had problems. I am not saying take kids with bad attitudes or drug habits, if their on field behavior is ok let them play. If their parents cause problems you will know in a game or two and deal with it then. Don't judge a kid until they have had their opportunity. You can be the coach that helped a child, or just another person that didn't give them a fair shot.

You are not understanding the why we would do this... a few months ago two of my players posted pics of themselves smoking dope on their Facebook pages. To add insult to injury one was wearing a t shirt with my team logo on it. This makes it my buisness! They are both off my team for unacceptable behavior. And if you think personal pages of Facebook, twitter, instagram, ask, or whatever other sites there are, are actually private, your sadly mistaken. BTW one of the kids was my starting shortstop star player.

 

[Easton33]

You are not understanding the why we would do this... a few months ago two of my players posted pics of themselves smoking dope on their Facebook pages. To add insult to injury one was wearing a t shirt with my team logo on it. This makes it my buisness! They are both off my team for unacceptable behavior. And if you think personal pages of Facebook, twitter, instagram, ask, or whatever other sites there are, are actually private, your sadly mistaken. BTW one of the kids was my starting shortstop star player.

If you have read all my posts then you missed the part where I agree with this, AFTER THEY HAVE MADE THE TEAM AND BEEN NOTIFIED OF RULES AND WHAT YOU EXPECT. I am talking about prejudging girls and making silly or stupid Facebook posts ( parent behavior too) a determinating factor on if they make the team. Of course I am not talking about 18u either but more the 14u and below. I absolutely support your decision to cut the girls. They had a line to walk and knew it, consequences follow.

 

[T.J.]

You are not understanding the why we would do this... a few months ago two of my players posted pics of themselves smoking dope on their Facebook pages. To add insult to injury one was wearing a t shirt with my team logo on it. This makes it my buisness! They are both off my team for unacceptable behavior. And if you think personal pages of Facebook, twitter, instagram, ask, or whatever other sites there are, are actually private, your sadly mistaken. BTW one of the kids was my starting shortstop star player.

I’m going to jump in here…I know the “Why”. I also know that you would probably have found out about the pot smoking without checking their FB. It’s too sad she has turned to drugs; I feel bad for her and the family. But let’s be realistic…while wearing a jersey, a young girls action is not an indication of the program’s values or behavior tolerances….it’s just not! Last I knew, we are not paying or supplementing these kids, as an investment, so they can make us money. So I disagree that their actions have a negative affect on the organization. College and Pros…totally different.

What happens if 6 or 7 of your players post inappropriate pictures? Do you disband the team? Did you lay out in black & white your policies, strict rules, possible discipline, and methods of monitoring? If not...you crossed the line. If you did, then yeah she was properly disciplined.

In my life, the best source of knowledge about my kids and her peers are all the parents. We all keep an eye out for each other, and treat all the kids as our own daughter when the situation calls for it (danger, alone, stranded, broke, etc.). All us parents know and trust each other very well too. Like Easton said…I try to know as much as I can before my kids go off with someone. I do my best, and trust my kids to a certain degree, and live & learn together as best we can. They know that when I ask them a life value or a “prying” question…99% of the time I already know the answer.

I guess my biggest gripe here is that we are their softball coach, and boundaries need to be maintained. When we as adults start checking on the private life of a 12, 14 or 16 year old girl, without the parent’s permission, we have crossed the line…and boundaries have broken down…which is not a good or healthy thing. This boundary line is also where the trust and loyalty between the coaching staff and players is met and maintained….you don’t want to lose that.

Remember…those who don’t trust…can’t be trusted.


I’m just a Engineering Dad with no formal education in all this…so FWIW it’s all IMO.

 

[SCDad]

I am with you T.J.

Somehow parents could parent and coaches could coach, before the internet.

Good old fashion networking (people to people that is), talking to folks, and listening is the first, and best, method. Good, better, and best ... always.

In fact, folks addicted to digital media make it a substitute, and soon lack real character judging abilities.

Our HS coach just learned how to get e-mail. And he is a great coach too.