Parent Drama - need advice.

[jsoftballcoach]

It got to the point where I couldn’t catch my DD I’m 18U. I wasn’t going to put on gear, but I didn’t do it as often and I lost it. The change became my favorite pitch.

Since I’m such a genius, was throwing BP to my DS without a net. He was struggling so I tried to build some confidence, he lined one into my shin, I never had a chance. This was in June, it stopped hurting but there is still a lump. I now use the net.


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[Lemond]

I am making a prototype.

These used to pop up in discussions once in a while:
Amazon product ASIN B07CCKR6QC
but I’ve never seen one up close, and do not personally know anyone that has used one.

 

[Rolling Hard]

These used to pop up in discussions once in a while:
Amazon product ASIN B07CCKR6QC
but I’ve never seen one up close, and do not personally know anyone that has used one.

Oh well, there goes that idea. It's probably a good idea but you could only use it in your own backyard. Would cause a lot of double takes, finger pointing and giggles at the park.

 

[SoftballDadnWV]

For the record, I would just like to say I’ve spent years sitting out in left or right field just to stay away from crazy parents so it’s not always the ones who sit alone who are the issue

My wife and I nearly always sit out in the outfield. My wife for the unobstructed view and me, well, I hope to be lucky enough for my 11 year old DD to somehow hit her first over the fence HR right to me She is getting closer, but nothing yet.

In 10u, I have seen parent drama for two years, but nothing really bad. The worst experience of 10u was a coach who only played his friends kids. My DD's 9 year old year they MAY have won 10 games and lost 25 or 30 at least - and that with a dominant pitcher who's parents took her and ran to a really good regional team, wisely. The coach ruined my DD's confidence (that year only) by not playing her in front of kids that could not catch or hit, or throw. The next year, new coach, girls were happier and they win 40 games and lose maybe 10. So my experience is not bad parents, though they were there I just didn't pay attention to them, but bad coaching. Also, my daughter has been told by a kid who had 2 or 3 hits all year, that my DD was no good and no one liked her. I let the coach know and he said that kid told every kid that on the team, because the girls didn't like that kid evidently - he just batted her last and stuck her in LF and paid no attention to her - you will have that on a 10u team I guess.

 

[Orange Socks]

I coached a girl back in the day. Dad and I are still solid friends. When she was playing for a 16U team in 8th grade, one of the dad AC's said that she is not very good and it got back to dad. He was fuming. Dad played Linebacker for TCU and his brother played for Baylor so you can imagine the family genes. Fast forward a few years, she is hitting bombs left and right. She hit 7 HR's her Junior year and 13 her Senior year in HS. She's a Sr in college and playing for her college team. So there's that.

 

[uncdrew]

I would discuss it with the coach. I think it's pretty clear none of the parents (or coaches) like this family and their attitude. It needs to be dealt with, and the team is likely better off without them.

For you and your daughter, simply do what you're doing. Work on improving, work on getting better. Make the most of your mound time, but don't want or expect all the mound time. There must be other pitchers on the teams, and your daughter doesn't get better by pitching every single inning. She needs breaks, needs rest, needs to have other pitchers helping.

Also, at 10U it may not be as apparent yet, but you will likely be on many teams over the years. And the teams you are on will have many different players over the years. If you need to move, move. Life is too short to deal with families like this one. If it gets too bad, talk to the coach and tell them you're needing to leave because of that family. If they want you more, they'll remove that family. And it'll probably make everyone happier.

 

[Big Nate]

Stay away from the drama and don't create it. College coaches are watching you as well as your kid!

 

[MaggieSil]

What your dealing with is fairly common in the 10U / 12U world. As stated in another reply if it's not negatively affecting your daughter, and you can avoid them then be the bigger person and do that. If your family leaves then they are getting their way. The softball world will allow you to meet many unbelievable people who you can create lifelong friendships with. It will also introduce you to some of the sorriest people I have ever met. They are typically out of the sport by 16U, and its typically the parents who are responsible.

Your first question, Is it common for teammates to compete against one another? Yes, they compete every day against one another. They are growing as players, and should be competing for playing time at practice, and in game performance matters as well. It's is what drives players to work harder, and develop in their craft.

This opportunity gives you a chance to teach your daughter how to be a good teammate!! Cheer on everyone as its a team sport. As a pitcher DD needs them, and they need her.

I came here today need this exact response so thank you for contributing this reply. We have a significant group of just really negative parents that bleed into some of the coaching staff in our area and it is a lot of work to make sure we are removed as much as we can be from that. I have been so disappointed in the amount of adults behaving like high school age children in this TB world… and it is such a small world.


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[GKCO]

Does OP have an update? Who won the fight?

 

[FP26]

If it is effecting your DD's enjoyment of the game then you need to do something, either talk to the coach,etc. or find another team. Otherwise I would leave it alone and just stay clear of them (I haven't watched DD practice for 3 or 4 years..) Those type of parents typically don't stick around with 1 team for very long..

A lot of good advice offered in this thread, but I would not overlook this one... specifically the bolded part. I saw quite a bit of this type of issue throughout my daughter's travel ball career. With zero exceptions, the parents that cause the most problems typically find a new team to torture every season.