Not sure if he really knows the game?

[bucket pinata]

Well if as a father I have to watch a adult scream at the top of his lungs while following her all the way back to the dugout or hear how she was called worthless in front of her team for 30 minutes we are going to have one short high school season. I make sure my DDs follow all the coaches instructions and give them the upmost respect at all times whether they agree with them or not. after all its the coaches show. But there is no way I could witness that and not make him understand abusing my kid mentally or verbally will not work out well for him, and it wouldn't be on a cell phone!

 

[Rocketech1]

I haven't, my daughter pitches and he doesn't seem to know how to call pitches. She knows better than to throw a fastball over the middle of the plate but he keeps calling that pitch. The bad part is if she doesn't throw the pitch she will get in trouble for not throwing what he is calling and when she does throw the pitch she is in danger of bullets being hit back up the middle. It is really not hard to discuss this with the coach but I don't believe it is for me to discuss this with the coach, my daughter needs to learn how to handle this problem.

Pitchers need to be smart, hit the corners for strikes and the HC won't know the difference. Parents, including me, see their kids with rose colored glasses. For example. One girl on our team who supposedly has a curve and screw ball but they have no real movement on them and she is inconsistent. So we don't call those pitches that often. Her parents think she has 6 pitches because her PC says she does and can't seem to understand why on earth we coaches are not calling them. I see this quite a bit. Maybe it's not the case in your situation but maybe the HC wants to rely on the other 8 defensive players to make the outs?

 

[doublenickel]

I can assure you he doesn't want to rely on the defense, they made 25 errors over a two game stretch. I keep all of the team stats for her school team and travel team and you can tell a difference in the stats too, her stats versus better competition in travel ball are quite a bit better than they are in school ball where the competition is pretty weak.

 

[YOCOACH]

My daughter went through this recently at her HS. She gave up a grand slam in the first inning last week, and on monday the coach called an hour long team meeting. He basically screamed at her for a half hour in front of the team letting them all know what an aweful, useless person she is. She turned in her jerseys the next day. The team held a meeting without the coach and confronted him, making him sign an "agreement" to stop being an abusive bully or they would all quit.

-W

A local prestigious HS in our area has a SB coach like this. Out of a school of 660, they have 301 girls according to my niece. 30-40 of them play TB. He can barely field a team each year and none of the TBers will play for him. Needless to say they haven't had a winning season since the 3rd year of his career which started 19 years ago. All of the TB players in the area know that if they want to go to a private HS and play SB, they need to go to this school's archrival which has a great coach and is always in the hunt for states in their division.

 

[JAD]

A local prestigious HS in our area has a SB coach like this. Out of a school of 660, they have 301 girls according to my niece. 30-40 of them play TB. He can barely field a team each year and none of the TBers will play for him. Needless to say they haven't had a winning season since the 3rd year of his career which started 19 years ago. All of the TB players in the area know that if they want to go to a private HS and play SB, they need to go to this school's archrival which has a great coach and is always in the hunt for states in their division.

After 19 years you would think the high school AD would have made a change....

 

[bucket pinata]

They must belong to the same country club.

After 19 years you would think the high school AD would have made a change....

 

[YOCOACH]

After 19 years you would think the high school AD would have made a change....

It's a perennial football powerhouse as many Catholic HS's in our area and the state are. Women's sports just don't rate that high in those schools unless they become a powerhouse unto themselves. Then they become important for recruitment purposes....not that they're aloud to do that

Edit to Add: I believe they call them Academic Scholarships....even if they can't read or do basic math as long as they can run a 4.2 40 and score touchdowns. Sorry, I'm a big cynic.

 

[JJsqueeze]

Respectfully tell him that you understand that in the heat of the moment he made a mistake, but that he will apologize to your daughter in front of the team and if it happens again, he will be subjected to the same treatment by you.

 

[GOINGDEEP]

HS coaches of ANY SPORT are like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're gonna get. I know a few good HS coaches and about 100 HS idiots. That's why I always warn parents that HS is nothing like competitive ball, only in very rare instances it might come close.

As a father I understand and feel your pain and frustration. From my HS experience of too many years, let this pass. As humans and coaches we can all make "a" mistake. See if he man's up, see if he handles your DD in a positive way to make up for the out-lash.

If it happens again, and is as extreme as you say, you might need to have "that" conversation with your family.......is it worth playing for this guy.

Good luck.

 

[riseball]

His actions transcend the game and the player-coach relationship. The fact that this happened in a softball game is only a footnote. If this was a stranger on the street verbally assaulting your DD would you put up with it? Maybe the hockey player in me but if you make my DD cry, I am going to make you cry.