Ah, sorry. Not a good situation.
This likely isn't really about weighlifting - it's about control and respect, and I don't mean that in a negative way.
The coach likely just wants your DD to show some respect for what he's trying to accomplish, i.e. respect for his process and his coaching. By circumventing his weightlifting suggestions for 3 years, you're probably not making him feel like his time and his team are important to your DD, although you are 100% right in thinking ROTC workouts, school, and TB are > HS softball weightlifting.
So, as others have suggested, if you can screw up the courage, go and talk to him 1:1. See what kind of a program you can work out with him. Maybe attendance at weightlifting 1 day a week? 2 days a week?
You could also avoid "the conversation" and have DD just make his workouts a priority for a couple weeks - I'm sure he'll be pleasantly surprised! Then let him know after that that she'll have to scale down a bit in favor of other activities. That's a much easier conversation to have.
*******
My DD's high school offers weights and conditioning a couple times a week. Although she regularly goes to the gym, she also attends as many of these HS sessions as she can. Says they're easy and it's social time. She gets to show off and talk to the baseball players.
This likely isn't really about weighlifting - it's about control and respect, and I don't mean that in a negative way.
The coach likely just wants your DD to show some respect for what he's trying to accomplish, i.e. respect for his process and his coaching. By circumventing his weightlifting suggestions for 3 years, you're probably not making him feel like his time and his team are important to your DD, although you are 100% right in thinking ROTC workouts, school, and TB are > HS softball weightlifting.
So, as others have suggested, if you can screw up the courage, go and talk to him 1:1. See what kind of a program you can work out with him. Maybe attendance at weightlifting 1 day a week? 2 days a week?
You could also avoid "the conversation" and have DD just make his workouts a priority for a couple weeks - I'm sure he'll be pleasantly surprised! Then let him know after that that she'll have to scale down a bit in favor of other activities. That's a much easier conversation to have.
*******
My DD's high school offers weights and conditioning a couple times a week. Although she regularly goes to the gym, she also attends as many of these HS sessions as she can. Says they're easy and it's social time. She gets to show off and talk to the baseball players.