Need advice on dealing with Aspergers

[obbay]

I have a returning player (LL, U16) who has Aspergers and I would welcome any advice.

She is constantly distracted, when a coach is speaking she looks for someone to talk to and will just start talking to someone about something unrelated. last year she would borrow helmets and bats without asking. when she strikes out (which is not uncommon) she throws a fit, sometimes throwing the helmet and or bat. she kind of needs a full time coach , just for her.

have any of you dealt with this before? The previous coaches didn't really deal with it. one coach would try to talk her down (after a K) but she would respond rudely, directing her anger at the coach who was trying to help.

after she was on our team, her parents told us about the Aspergers diagnosis, and that they weren't really sure how to deal with it.

thank you

 

[Amy in AZ.]

I have a student with it, but she is only 8. I see her easily distracted. I don't believe that Asperger's is a reason to misbehave, though.
Perhaps there are varying degrees.

She certainly can't be allowed to throw the bat or helmet. I guess a sit down is in order, with her and her parents.

It sounds like this is tough on everyone.

 

[Coachw01]

I have a similar situation that I deal with in a ten year old. She is not a child with aspergers but has labels of EI, OHI, and ADHD. She has a terrible family history and comes from about the saddest story you'll ever hear. During the course of play she talks/yells/sings constantly, runs in to players trying to make plays and is a huge distraction at practice. While on the bench she again, sings, stands on bats, and try's to talk to everyone in the crowd.

Last year I found out she was not on my rec team and I asked if I could have her. Along with being her coach I am also her building principal and I was scared to death how another coach might treat her and they would not know how to handle her. As much as she is a huge pain, she has circumstances and situations that are beyond her control. I love the girl to death so I make sure that I try to put her in positions and situations where she can be successful if possible and try to find the smallest of victories whenever possible to celebrate. You are right, she needs a personal coach and that job is something my wife helps out with a lot. She keeps the book and also works as a recess aide so she is a friendly and familiar face for her. Everyone involved in this girls life is very supportive (she is being raised by grandparent) and never has the whole 'takes a village to raise a child' been more true.

You're in a tough situation and I wish you the best of luck. My suggestion is to try to find those little successes along the way and try to manage her more than control her and utilize as many people as you can as advocates. Good luck!!

 

[redhotcoach]

W01....I just have to say thanks man!!!! My son treads on the same paths. Some folks...teachers, coaches, see absolute super hero abilities he has and love on him to death. Then he has had others in his life teachers...coaches, that just, well...hate him. Thank you so much for seeing life and people beyond just the surface.

 

[obbay]

Thanks for the input! I had her when she was in Farm/7yo and as much as she was a little more active, we just thought she was a character. Now she's 13/14 and still behaving like a 7 yo. Now she's an expert on the RedSox and insists on talking about the Sox when she should be paying attention to the game.

. I am always positive with her whenever I see her and try to encourage her. She also plays baseball at the same time she's playing softball and will try to talk about baseball whenever she can. I have spoken with her in a very positive tone explaining that while I like the Sox too, I like softball and while we are here to play softball, that's the only sport we can talk about. I have loaned them DVDs of college games I've recorded so she could see how the game is played at the highest levels, also to see the differences- like how much faster the game moves. she is a switch hitter in baseball so I have encouraged her to just hit lefty in softball.

In the off season I saw them at a school concert and told her to google drag bunting and slap hitting because that is what we are going to teach her this year.

 

[coach james]

My 9 year old nephew has it. Its a version of autism. Most people with it are extremely hyperactive. Its like ADHD on steroids and ginseng. For my nephew, and many others consistency is key. Have a routine and consistent schedule. Explain the situation to all of the parents, and how their dd's should behave with her. She needs to have one of her parents present at all times. Maybe as a volunteer asst. Give her a lot of praise on what's done well and completely ignore the negative. As hard as it is, don't even look in her direction during one of these tantrums. Let her parents handle that. Its a rough road but remember, this is her all day every day life, and above all else, treat her the way you would want someone else to treat your dd if she was her.

 

[obbay]

OILF- Thanks for clarifying the age thing. from what I have witnessed, I thought having her parent on the bench would make her worse. Like putting out fire with gasoline. Everything else I'm on board with.