New 10U Dad / Coach Ohio
- Thread starter gkroger
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- Jul 1, 2022
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It's ok to be pushy. If she really loves softball and wants to take her game to the next level, she'll be ok with it.
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- Jun 18, 2023
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well that's not true. maybe. but she's 10. This, and every other place, is full of people with daughter's that love softball but it's a fight to get them to practice.
Emphasize how you only get better with regular practice, but what you're asking is the quintessential parent question. "How do I get my kid to practice more, put her dishes away, clean her room, do her homework..."etc.
Make sure she has the tools/spot/place/time to actually practice is the #1 thing, and build on that.
- Jul 1, 2022
- 128
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There are two types of kids who play softball. Those who want to get better and care about their performance during games, and those who simply like to be on a team and play for fun. Both are valid reasons to play.
I think it's fine to push girls in the former category. It's your job as a parent coach to teach her that the extra work she is putting in at home will translate to her performance.
IMO pushing a player to get better at softball is different than making them do the dishes or clean their room, because they are not motivated by clean dishes and clean rooms. If they are motivated by better softball performance then they need to learn that extra work at home leads to better success on the field.
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I think it's fine to push girls in the former category. It's your job as a parent coach to teach her that the extra work she is putting in at home will translate to her performance.
IMO pushing a player to get better at softball is different than making them do the dishes or clean their room, because they are not motivated by clean dishes and clean rooms. If they are motivated by better softball performance then they need to learn that extra work at home leads to better success on the field.
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We had a game Monday night she went 3-3 with 2 RBI’s so that definitely brought here motivation up.. plus she plays on a rec team and it’s only her 3rd season and I think she falls into both of those categories leaning more heavily towards the one who wants to get better and I think she starting to see that in her play
- Jun 18, 2023
- 536
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I repeat that at 10 years old, who knows? Many seem like they're in that second category but are actually in the first. They just don't know how to _communicate_ that. The words and phrases _you_ use and recognize as 'caring' have been muscle-memoried in your brain for decades.
Here's an example I've recently noticed in my daughter, who probably walks that line. (and is absolutely failing at communicating her feelings about this stuff) She's often in the circle, and sometimes you get those soft trickles between the mound and third. She'll get there, pick it up, look at first, and walk back to the circle.
First impressions are "she's just shrugging about a hit and ready to go back to the pitching thing she likes" but between other plays and the little I can get out of her about her thinking in the heat of the moment, it's more about she simply doesn't think an out is going to happen, so she safely ends the play (Dead ball when pitcher has ball in circle). Yes, it'd be nice if she was a better, more aggressive fielder and jumped on that ball on came up firing, but it's not that she's just shrugging off the hit, she's situationally aware and making the call not to throw.
Can I push her? I dunno, gotta pick my moments mostly. She wants to get better. I know she does, but she also doesn't want to practice in the backyard. She knows that next year she's going to be competing with 6th graders in rec for pitching time, and that she needs to work hard to be on that level, but it seems clear she lacks the maturity/conviction to connect cause to effect.
So we compromise. So here are the tips that have actually worked for me to get her to get a few more reps in, understanding that literally everyone is different, motivated differently, committed differently.
1. She prefers an actual softball field. She'll pitch much better on some dirt somewhere than the grass in my backyard. There's something to the idea of "other things I want to do are literally right there"
2. foresight. If I say "We're just gonna go outside for 20 minutes before dinner, before girl scouts, while you're mother and sister are getting ready to leave.." etc, she's less likely to fight me than if she's knee deep in Minecraft and I walk in and am like "Let's go throw pitches"
3. New drills/tools/etc. Hard to keep this one up, but like the first day I got the weighted balls, it was a lot easier to get her outside to swing at them. She's helping Dad with his new stuff, not practicing, it's different. I grabbed some fielding paddles a few weeks back, same thing. It helps if I phrase it as "New drill that I want to try with your younger sister's team" because it taps into her "Softball is awesome, everyone should do softball, i'll help you make her do softball" attitude.
- Jul 1, 2022
- 128
- 28
It's also easier to establish a set routine (20-30 mins every day) than to try to get them out for an hour+ once a week. Once you establish that it's as routine as brushing their teeth then you'll see less resistance.
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- Nov 1, 2022
- 19
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She is 10. Unless she already has a burning desire for the sport then you need to introduce her to the drills yourself and spend as much time with her as possible working with her. Make it rewarding. Most 10 yr old kids don't have the maturity to know how far they want to go with it yet. There are exceptions and you will know it if you see it. Make it fun, take it slow and steady and see how she likes to perform in a higher pressure environment like travel ball before writing her future career path. GL.
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