Become good at something(s)....
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Become Good at Something(s)
- Thread starter Doug Romrell
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My DD is only 9 but I always remind her that God gave her gifts to please those that cannot. Basically he gave her the gift of athleticism to please those who cannot due to physical limitation or the like. I tell her to always give her all and never take that for granted because there are a lot of people out there who would give anything to be in her shoes for just one day.
Good topic, DR. ..
I'm sure this is a minority view, but I don't know that it's that important to encourage kids to be the best at something in their childhood. I don't even believe in the adage, ''Always do your best.'' There are times when it's fine when kids don't do their best. Doing things recreationally has great value, also.
I know that makes me a hippie, but let me explain my thought process before taking the arrows.
First, I should note that my daughter is engaged in a pursuit to be very good at something - softball. And I help and support her. And it's a lot of FUN! We'll treasure it. So I'm certainly not against it. In fact, I'm living it w/ my child.
But, when I was a kid, my parents didn't really care what I did as long as I stayed out of trouble. Not sure I can remember my father watching my sports events. He worked all the time. My mother watched some, not all, but never commented on my effort, except once she pointed out I was being a brat in a basketball game, and I really appreciate that looking back, because I was guilty in that case.
Also, I look back and think I could've been much, much better at lots of things, namely baseball and school I was OK at both, but definitely an underachiever.
But I don't have any regrets over that. Maybe if I thought I could've been really, really good at those things, I would've. But I grew up and developed my own passions as an adult and tried to be good at those later in life. My parents were excellent at being accepting and non-judgmental.
I do wish sometimes that they had showed more interest in my hobbies, but then again, I also appreciate that they trusted me to figure it out for myself. I never had to question that what I was doing was all my own. Never felt pressure to please anybody, or that I might disappoint somebody, in any activity that I did.
When I went to college, suddenly school meant a lot to me. And I think I've been very conscientious ever since in work and other things.
So I just don't know if a kid having a pursuit of excellence in childhood is that essential in the long run.
Like I said, good topic.
The more I think about it, I might conclude with this -- So much of our opinions are probably based on our own lives. Maybe if you really wanted to be very good at something as a child, you'll resent it if your parents didn't care enough to notice. That would be unfortunate.
But I didn't have that drive as a child. Just wanted to enjoy childhood. I didn't have those desires until I became an adult, and I don't know that it mattered that I wasn't trained on how to pursue excellence as a kid.
So maybe the point of agreement is this -- Care about your kid. Help them attain what THEY want to attain. And if they don't want to be great at something, that's fine too. If you're a good role-model and love and care about them, they'll find their way, even if they don't win any medals or ribbons in childhood.
I'm sure this is a minority view, but I don't know that it's that important to encourage kids to be the best at something in their childhood. I don't even believe in the adage, ''Always do your best.'' There are times when it's fine when kids don't do their best. Doing things recreationally has great value, also.
I know that makes me a hippie, but let me explain my thought process before taking the arrows.
First, I should note that my daughter is engaged in a pursuit to be very good at something - softball. And I help and support her. And it's a lot of FUN! We'll treasure it. So I'm certainly not against it. In fact, I'm living it w/ my child.
But, when I was a kid, my parents didn't really care what I did as long as I stayed out of trouble. Not sure I can remember my father watching my sports events. He worked all the time. My mother watched some, not all, but never commented on my effort, except once she pointed out I was being a brat in a basketball game, and I really appreciate that looking back, because I was guilty in that case.
Also, I look back and think I could've been much, much better at lots of things, namely baseball and school I was OK at both, but definitely an underachiever.
But I don't have any regrets over that. Maybe if I thought I could've been really, really good at those things, I would've. But I grew up and developed my own passions as an adult and tried to be good at those later in life. My parents were excellent at being accepting and non-judgmental.
I do wish sometimes that they had showed more interest in my hobbies, but then again, I also appreciate that they trusted me to figure it out for myself. I never had to question that what I was doing was all my own. Never felt pressure to please anybody, or that I might disappoint somebody, in any activity that I did.
When I went to college, suddenly school meant a lot to me. And I think I've been very conscientious ever since in work and other things.
So I just don't know if a kid having a pursuit of excellence in childhood is that essential in the long run.
Like I said, good topic.
The more I think about it, I might conclude with this -- So much of our opinions are probably based on our own lives. Maybe if you really wanted to be very good at something as a child, you'll resent it if your parents didn't care enough to notice. That would be unfortunate.
But I didn't have that drive as a child. Just wanted to enjoy childhood. I didn't have those desires until I became an adult, and I don't know that it mattered that I wasn't trained on how to pursue excellence as a kid.
So maybe the point of agreement is this -- Care about your kid. Help them attain what THEY want to attain. And if they don't want to be great at something, that's fine too. If you're a good role-model and love and care about them, they'll find their way, even if they don't win any medals or ribbons in childhood.
1 out of 4 is pretty good, right ? ;-(
Sorry if I went overboard w/ my reply. I should be less serious on Friday. 
Your kids are Out In Space too???
Sorry if I went overboard w/ my reply. I should be less serious on Friday.
Why? You nailed it. Life isnt a set of cubbies that you have to fit perfectly into one. In the real world you show me an expert, someone who the company cannot function without. And I'll show you someone who is unpromotable. Allow your kids to explore various things don't only focus on what they are good at now. Let them try things and even fail. Life's best lessons are often earned via failure.
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I don't always agree with OILF, and I have publicly (here) taken her to task on some of those views. However, I am of the mind that if you are willing to publicly disagree, you should be just as quick to acknowledge agreement (it just seems fair). So some of those are mine, I think OILF truly does have the health and safety of her players in the forefront and often times she says things that the bucket dads don't want to hear. And for standing up to the staus quo I commend her.
As for these sorts of off topic attacks I don't like them. Its not fair to her or to anyone for someone to just take a shot at them for no real reason. I am sure I have made that mistake in the past, but I try to delete those posts long before I hit post.
Someone once said "Rudeness is a weak person's imitation of strength" and it certainly applies to the internet.
