I'm not sure if i want to play anymore

[mcdonald11kathy]

I remember my freshman year in high school, I used love softball even though I never played a game but it was so much fun and i probably never played because i never played softball before high school. I wanted to play so i worked hard and im not a bad player, im actually a very acthelic girl. Now I'm in my sophomore year and I start in the games but I just don't feel love for the game anymore. I don't know what it is and I want to take a break (to see if I'm going to miss it because that's how i am about a lot of situations) but I'm afraid that my coach and my teammates wouldn't understand or that nobody would understand and ask me so much question i cant and dont want to answer. My main problem is how do i tell my team and coach about this and all the annoying questions i dont want people to keep asking me. Im really confuse and i need a lot of help, especially from all the pressure i feel from pretty much everybody that knows i play softball. I dont know i just need someones advice

 

[29dad]

I feel your angst. I went to college on a full scholarship for hockey and the start of my sophomore year I wanted to quit so badly that I felt like I was going to have a nervous breakdown. I hung in there, and the feeling passed. My personal opinion is that you should at least stick it out for the season. Honor your commitment. Good luck with whatever decision you make.

 

[David Carter]

Well how far exactly into the season are you? you have to somehow balance what you feel you want to do, not play anymore, against a commitment you made to play on the team. If you are a starter it sounds like your coach and your team are counting on you. You should not base this decision on anything having to do with your brother just on what is going on in your situation.

I would also talk to your parents, I think there is a big misunderstanding that parents don't want to talk to or listen to kids problem but the exact opposite is true we as parent want our kids to talk to us. I think you can explain to them that you don't really enjoy the game anymore and don't want to play but you do understand about the commitment you made to play. One thing I would make sure of is that as you are playing right now make sure you still give 100% to doing your best, that might be hard because you don't really want to but you owe that to your teammates.

I don't think there is a right or wrong answer by not playing anymore you give someone a chance to play that might really love the game and is just waiting for their chance but by playing until the season is over you keep your commitment to the team and at least in your coaches eyes give your team the best chance to win. This is one of those life decisions that are not easy but that you have to think through and then make a choice and be able to be happy in that choice no matter what happens afterwards.

Good Luck with your decision

 

[GOINGDEEP]

Just be honest with yourself about why you're quitting ( or thinking of quitting ). If you no longer have a love of the game as you say, maybe a break would do you good to see if you miss it. If you're quitting for social reasons, boys, friends who don't play and pressure you............you really need to think that through before you act.

Just 3 weeks ago we had a player come over to the house and talk to me and DD about quitting the HS team. Her reason was she wasn't "feeling" it much anymore too. She quit a week later. BUT, I've soon come to realize she did it for the wrong reasons. She was/is hanging around the wrong crowd ( partying, drinking, smoking ) and now she has told me how much she regrets quitting. Maybe the coach takes her back next year, maybe he doesn't.

How much longer do you have for the season? We have about a month, 6 weeks if we return to state. Do you feel so strongly you need to quit in the middle, or tough it out and have a few months to rethink your situation for next year?

 

[mcdonald11kathy]

my season ends in May, I only want to quit my Hs team not my outside league and i dont know if i can tough it out because when i dont feel like playing i make mistakes then i get really emotional. i dont know if i can deal with all the mistakes. I know that i shouldnt let the mistakes get to me and that i should just have fun but its difficult for me to forget my mistakes especially when the coach keeps telling me what i did wrong. I also know that this is to help me but i just feel worst about it.

 

[CoachBroker]

Is there a chance that you loved last year because you we're on the team but had no pressure because you did not play? Now that your getting to play there is more pressure not to mess up. Do you find yourself worrying about failing or letting your team down? Confidence will come as you get better but if your heart is not in it then don't plan on playing next year but take the advice given above about fulfilling your commitment.
By the way, I dropped out of athletics midway through my freshman year. I loved to fish and hunt more than I liked school sports. I never regretted it, and I ended up fishing on the pro tour for about 6 years after college. Follow your heart.

 

[mcdonald11kathy]

Yeah, thats probably right, i do worry about failing. Thank you so much

 

[Greenmonsters]

The only important person you have to answer to is yourself; however, I think its always a good practice to fulfill your commitments, so I'd recommend sticking out this SB season unless it would be completely unbearable. Looking forward, what is it that YOU really like to do or think you would like to try to do? It may really be softball or it could be another sport, like track, or another activity, like drama or community service. Sometimes it takes us a while to find it, even when we're adults!

You are a unique work of art in progress with many exciting opportunities, paths, and adventures lying ahead of you to explore. Good luck and enjoy the journey.

 

[splinterpicker]

What do you plan on doing with the spare time? Most coaches I that I know do not deal well with players that quit then want to come back without a very good reason. Visit with your coach and parents.

 

[mad hornet]

There is a life lesson for a young woman here. You made a commitment and now you have an entire team counting on you. I know people who go to work every day for a boss they hate and do it for years because they have a family at home counting on them. Tough it out for the rest of the season and then you have all the time you want to decide about next year. If you quit now, you will always be that quitter who let her team down. These are the decisions that regrets are made of.