Interesting post from a father

[Screwball]

The topic of coaching has gotten me thinking and I found this post from a father who has kids in both softball and baseball. More food for thought.

Reflections on All Stars X3 | Girls Fastpitch Softball

I do take this seriously because I was hurt by the treatment I received and so are some of the young ladies who come visit me for lessons.

This is not to say that there aren't good coaches out there, but it seems impossible to avoid the ones as described in this father's post. They ruin the impact of the good ones.

Yesterday, the antics of one team's coaches made me overlook the good work of the other side's coaches, who won the game.

 

[undergroundga]

I can echo this father's sentiment. Our dd played rec. ball this summer(as she always has) and it will be her last, in our town anyway. Partly because the league was so poorly organized but mostly because of the coaching. Our coaches , for our age group, are so disliked in our region, for being just what this father described, that our all-star team could only play one tournament. It was the regional tournament hosted in our own park, and a few teams didn't show up. No one else would play with us. Last year, one of the coaches argued about a rule he didn't know and even entered the other teams dugout to curse at coaches, parents in the stands, and allegedly kids. He was our head coach!
Our second coach is banned in several leagues and once got beat up at a tournament so bad he was sent to the hospital.
But both of these guys will be coaching again next year. When asked about it our bored gives the usual no one else will do it response. But every season a couple new guys will coach and it'll be their only season because of dealing with the two aforementioned coaches.
It is an embarrassment for town. Many parents this year said they will play somewhere else next season. I don't think they really will, but I can promise we will.

 

[undergroundga]

It is a vicious cycle. The worst is it runs off girls that could be better if given a chance.
Our high school athletics is terrible. I think our poor system of developing future players is partly to blame. Everyone sits around and talks about how good our teams use to be, and how good our rec league use to be. No body seems to be correlating the two, or no one cares. The kids are the ones that end up hurt.
I helped coach a rec team this season and saw some girls that were rough around the edges but could be worked into a good group of players. Unfortunately they did not get much of a chance, and the mess will continue next year as their numbers dwindle.

 

[T Red]

From the excerpt.

Coaches, remember, take your responsibility of handling a team seriously. If you are not qualified, it is better to leave it to those who are.

I appreciate the authors view. But he just got a life lesson in rec ball. Good coaches rarely stay in rec ball. It's unfortunate but it's the way things are.


I agree something needs to be done. I doubt LL will be able to enforce an accreditation for their coaches, most of the time it's whoever is breathing and willing.


Rec ball is over by 12 yo in my area. If a girl is decent she moves to TB and that leaves rec without enough players. I feel we do loose some good talent in this process. Many parents are scared off by the expense of TB and never give their dd a chance.

 

[softballphreak]

I like what the leaders of our State High School Association urged coaches to do. They said act on the field as you would in the classroom. If this rule was followed by all there would be far less yelling. If Principals and ADs and Rec leaders would enforce this suggestion it would be a much healthier environment for all.

 

[BB875]

If you can determine as a parent that the coach is more interested in satisfying his/her ego or hidden agenda than looking out for the best interest of the team, then it is time to leave. The situation will not get better and the coach will not look out for your kid. Its better to leave early than stick it out and "hope for the best."

 

[SnocatzDad]

I've have a daugther wrapping up her softball career and a son in the middle of his time in Lacro$$e. IME the youngest ages for both are usually where the worst behaviour is shown and tolerated mostly because people with the least knowledge of the game usually create the most problems. Lacro$$e in our area does some things that I think really help clean up the sport and IMO restores the honor of competition versus allowing the lowest common denominator to rule. Each team has a non-coach sideline manager that is in charge of the adults on their own team during games. You can joke around about how your going to boot all your fellow parents during the game, but the net result is that you behave better when someone you know personally is monitoring your behavior and are more likely to settle down when asked to do so by someone you know. We host the largest Lax tourney in the midwest (~50 teams) and at our tournaments the refs are responsible for filling out a scorecard on the fans, players, and coaches on their sportsmanship. Winners get acknowledged and problem teams aren't invited back. At this point Lacro$$e is in it's infancy here and every tournament has waiting lists, so that's a powerful tool.

 

[Greenmonsters]

Here's another interesting post from a father. You don't see many posts about the fathers of girls who didn't have a father around or who had a father who didn't give a s*** about their DD's activities and passions. I think I'll risk working or even coaching my DD so she can improve her game despite the danger of potential overuse.

 

[RookKev]

Wow Green. I totally understand your ire, but at the same time, I appreciate the commentary in the previous post. It's extremely difficult trying to find that balance of helping our children become the best they can, and yet also not asking them to push beyond their physical limitations.

 

[Greenmonsters]

Agreed that finding the right balance is tricky - but that's part of the challenge of being a parent. I empathize w/ Screwball's difficult experiences with some pig-headed coaches and parents but IMO this is something that as a player, a player's parent, or as a coach that we all face and have to deal with. The pigheaded population is unlikely to read this forum so any advice to them is lost. The majority of the people that come here to read and/or post are here because they want to become more knowledgeable and effective at what they do, whether it be coaching, instructing, or working w/ their DDs on their own. The DFP forum is is a great place to occasionally brag, rant, or complain, but IMO the same basic complaints in variously titled threads are tiresome and redundant. Time to move on.