Thanks all...everything you said I have done so just wanted to see if I was on the right track! Thanks!!
Check the state, district or HS rules. I don't know any HS team that allows you to miss HS practice for a club team activity of any kind. I would count it an unexcused absence, bench her for the next game, and warn her she can get suspended. Here they go straight to suspension, but it sounds like your players were not told of these rules. So that could be an issue for you. However, the rules come from above you.
I can only speak from our experience. During HS season, HS is #1. During TB season, TB is #1. Both coaches are talked to ahead of time and no problems have came about. Honestly, both are just happy DD is playing nearly year round.
If the kid has playing any MS or HS sports of any kind, he or she knows the rules, as does her parents. One assumes this is a 9th graders (after that most TB teams don't try and hold scrimmages), and they can't drive. So certainly the family knows or has responsibility to know the rules as they are similar from sport to sport. A handbook is provided to all parents. Some of these rules are verbatim from state to state through NFHS. In some states where the rules are stricter, the team can lose its wins if a player violates the no outside participation rules. She should be happy she can play on a club team during HS because many can't.
The NFHS has no such rule against outside participation. A handbook is not necessarily provided to every parent. And at no point was it stated that this was a violation of any rule. Once again you are making unfounded assumptions. Everything does not work the same way as it does in your little corner of the world.
I agree with riseball. The rules being quoted are not the same as my "little corner".
This is directly from my state's website:
"Outside Participation
If you participate in a non-school athletic program during the PIAA Season for that sport, while enrolled at a school which has a Team in that sport, you will not be eligible for District and Inter-District Championship Contests in that sport unless you are in uniform and available to participate as a member of your school Team for at least 75% of its Regular Season Contests."