Too many tournaments

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Feb 20, 2020
377
63
My daughter is a senior, headed off to college in the fall. She's not playing college ball, and has been a pretty average B pitcher on a pretty bad B team for years -- they play 18U now. She's loved her coaches and her teammates (for the most part) and she likes playing the games.

Last season, as we were discussing coming back, i told the coach (who is a pretty good pal) the kind of season we were hoping for her last year. Keep the number of local tourneys to a minimum so the seniors on the team would have time to spend with their families, and maybe take a couple of fun tournaments for the girls' last year. In the spring we're gong to have college trips and graduations and proms and all that stuff, and we didn't want to have our last summer filled with the same local tourneys against the same local teams we've been losing to for years. This conversation wasn't just me -- it was with all the senior families and I thought we'd reached agreement. We'd get together and talk about tournaments as a group plan out this last year.

I offered to be the team manager to make this season easier for the coach. she said that would be great, but then never really answered my texts or questions about what she might need to help.

Not long after the season ended -- about the time tryouts ended -- our coach merged/.absorbed another team. That team was a lot of juniors, and of our six seniors, two decided to leave. I talked to the coach and she said it was all great, that they were getting good new players and adding some pitching. But when I asked about the schedule, she said she and the coaches were working on it and they'd get it to us soon. Well, last week they did. Just your usual 13-tournament summer, with 12 tournaments in town and one end-of-year to Mount Rushmore.

But here's the problem. First, the pitchers they added are worse than DD, which leaves her as the only barely competent one. But the second is that she simply can't be there for five tournaments. She's got college trips planned for two of them, her senior trip planned for third, and prom and graduation interfering with two more. The team that was supposed to be a group of seniors has now become dominated by juniors, and they want to play a regular season. So DD and I talked about her quitting, but if she does, the team is simply done. They don't have pitching. So she's caught between letting people down and letting people down, and I'm pissed at the coach because we agreed to come back under a set of expectations and conditions, and those conditions have all changed.

Anyone have suggestions?
 
May 17, 2012
2,804
113
Not a lot of players keep playing after graduation for these reasons. I would just email the coach and say you can't make those 5 tournaments and see where it goes.

Just be prepared for the possibility that the coach adds more pitching which may impact the tournaments when you do play.
 
Jun 20, 2015
848
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that many tourneys is like 12u, when they don't have restrictions vs HS ball.

I've coached 18u now for 5 seasons, we never only have 1 or 2 pitchers. Also, season starts 1 June and ends 31 July, with usually 1 off weekend. This year we have 7 tourneys (1 off weekend and 1 travel weekend to Florida for long tourney) schedule was published last fall and that's what it is. If player is going to miss, speak up early.
 
Jun 11, 2012
741
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C’s travel team played in 6 showcases and 1 fun tournament every year she played for them. We always had a tentative schedule in the fall so we could plan college visits etc around it.
I’d have her tell the coach she can’t make those 5 tournaments now and see what happens.
 
Jul 14, 2018
982
93
12 tournaments at 18U? Are you in a state that plays HS in the fall?

I wouldn’t feel too bad about missing five tournaments. If your daughter is a senior and not planning to continue playing, I would actually pad that and tell the coach you’ll be missing seven to allow for some unexpected end-of-senior-year activities.

If you were clear that you expected a reduced schedule, and the coach entered a dozen tournaments without securing additional pitching, then that’s on them.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 
Oct 10, 2018
305
63
IIWY I'd make my summer plans and tell the coach you won't be able to make x, x, and x dates (and drop the manager thing). Alternatively, maybe not even register and tell her your daughter can guest for X, X, and X dates but will be missing so many dates it doesn't make sense to join the team again this year. The good thing about being the team's best pitcher is they will likely be disappointed her time with them is limited but happy to have her when she's available. Enjoy a minimum-softball summer before sending your baby off to college if that's what your family wants to do.
 
May 10, 2021
149
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Why would a pretty bad B team want to play in 13 tourneys at 18U?

I hope the answer is they love the game and the fun.

I agree with most of the posters. Honesty is the best policy. This is it...make the best of it.
 
Aug 10, 2016
686
63
Georgia
Not DDs team but a couple of girls DD plays HS with are on a team with 16 tournaments that started Feb and they finish end of July. 2022/23 team. My jaw dropped when I saw how many!
7 of the tournaments will be out of state - I like watching my kid play but I don't get how they aren't going to get burnt out and die. Not to mention the expenses. That is 3 tournaments a month... Bye bye senior fun for the 2022s....

And one of the tourneys is around the time graduation happens. We did that tourney last year and my oldest DD graduated that weekend - luckily she graduated on a Monday and we were done by Sunday so DD didn't have to miss any games.
 
Jul 31, 2015
761
93
Guest play, it will save you time, money, and the stress of feeling like you've let the team down.

The coach should be glad to have a star pitcher half the time, beats the alternative.
 

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