The Girls Club

[obbay]

One of my pet peeves is when a "team" isn't a team but is nothing more than a "Girls Club". HS Varsity team is one such team (Enabled by the coach). Its the end of the season and one AC (new to the team) just realized this.

I am concerned because some of these princesses (Enough to affect the chemistry of the team) will be on our U18 TB team this summer.

Any recommendations of how we should approach the team in order to nip this cancer in the bud?

 

[CoogansBluff]

One of my pet peeves is when a "team" isn't a team but is nothing more than a "Girls Club". HS Varsity team is one such team (Enabled by the coach). Its the end of the season and one AC (new to the team) just realized this.

I am concerned because some of these princesses (Enough to affect the chemistry of the team) will be on our U18 TB team this summer.

Any recommendations of how we should approach the team in order to nip this cancer in the bud?

Not sure what you mean. Explain ''Girls Club.''

DD was on a TB team last year that might've fit what you're saying. Though it was a showcase team, players were more concerned about their friendships on the team than the team itself. For example, if we had a player pick up who was a prospect to add to the team, the players would accept or reject her based primarily on how she fit in socially. Never mind that a really good player can be valuable to the ''stated'' objective of the team, which was to be showcased to college coaches.

 

[obbay]

CB- that sounds like it. Players who choose their level of support or cooperation with other players based on social status or acceptance into the clique. It's more about "me" than "we". and the parents will enable this behavior if we ignore it. It may come down to the fac that some of the "Queen bees and Wannabes" are not planning to play in college.

 

[Hawkeyes]

It's just the opposite for us. I will take the team chemistry of our high school team over the travel ball team any day. Our travel ball team has some entitled, selfish, its all about me, personalities completely enabled by parents. Our head coach is aware and trying to change this culture, but its tough when parents are spearheading it.

 

[KPower]

DD's team is much younger (12U) but they already have that kind of behavior. DD is not one of the "cool" girls because she isn't interested in snap-chatting and intstagram-ing while in the dug-out. She has no interest in prank texting someone's boyfriend. (and why they have boyfriends at 11 and 12...well that's a whole other thread) She is however one of the best players and hardest workers on the team. It is hard for her because the coaches love her because she gives 100% and is very coachable, but the girls don't necessarily try to make her feel like a part of things. The coach only seems to care when it is HIS daughter who is on the outs with the "cool" girls. These girls have the potential to be great, but some of the social dynamics on the team hold them back. The parents are just as bad. The queen bee's mom on the team is exactly like her daughter. Befriending and dropping other parents on a whim. I sit by myself and try to stay out of it. It's hard. Especially when the coach just wants to shut his eyes to how much the social dynamic affects the game.

 

[obbay]

KP- been there and done that! I have even seen parents create situations that exclude friends who might interfere with their DD's social status.
Even though I knew what to expect in High School, I am still surprised that the girls can control the adults who are supposedly in charge.