Questions about "playing up"

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Jun 8, 2016
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To me, it's all about parents wanting their kid to be a superstar.

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If that was the case, they would just let their kid play at their own age level and dominate. My kid has played up since she started playing rec (minus her 1st year in T-ball) and has played up in TB as well. I did it because it was the best way for her to be challenged, not so she could be a superstar...I would guess that 95% of the time nobody knows she is playing up (only would be the case if they know her personally) so there is no "wow that kid is playing up, she must be a superstar" going on. She has plenty of friends at school and makes friends on whatever team she has played on..
 
Mar 28, 2020
40
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She is a bit below her friends..but I also think it has more to do with confidence than they are *that* much better. She gets nervous! I also offer to play catch with her all the time! I love sports and being active, she usually doesn't want to. She is a bit afraid of getting hit with the ball.. which I think is part of why she doesn't want to play catch.

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To me, this is the answer to keeping her "down" this year. Softball IQ and confidence should be built while skills are improving. If she is nervous and afraid of the ball, she's not ready. That doesn't mean she won't be, or that softball isn't her sport, and it doesn't mean that you can't help her improve in the off season... I hate to hear that some have already decided that by 9 or 10 years old girls are either softball players or they're not. Keep at it.

I still think there is a safety issue with a 10U player who can't catch, whether we all think 10U is *the worst* or not. We have a pretty small pool of softball players in our area, so rec/ LL and travel ball players cross over quite a bit. DD pitches- and throws strikes!- even last year at the 10U level. She threw about 45 mph last year when she took a line drive to the head in the circle... and she can duck and catch. So, the point is, injuries can happen even at this age. Don't make your kid a sitting duck so that she can be with her friends. There is plenty of time for her to "catch up."

Good luck! I think we are all curious what you will decide to do!!
 
Oct 4, 2018
4,611
113
I think it's good to have a system like that.. however I still just find the whole playing up thing silly.. why can't all the kids just play in the correct age group?? Otherwise, it creates issues like in our league where any entire grade of girls now wants to move up.

I played many travel sports for years as a kid.. there were some great players.. no one played out of their own age group! It just wasn't a thing. And I think.. If kids could choose.. they'd want to stay with their same age friends. To me, it's all about parents wanting their kid to be a superstar.

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There are scenarios when playing up is the right thing to do:

1. She would physically hurt girls if she played with her age group. The girl is simply a beast who grew earlier than most.
2. She would quit the sport if she played with her age group. She's just at a high level skill-wise and would get frustrated playing down.

The solution is to have the league decide who can play up and who can't. Not the parents.
 
May 23, 2018
93
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Hi all, I am a relatively new softball parent. My 8 (almost 9) yr old has played for two seasons. This coming spring season MOST of her 3rd grade teammates are moving up to 10U. Some because that is their correct age group despite being in the same grade and some because they want to "play up."

I don't understand this "playing up", if ALL of the girls play up then no one is in the correct division, what is the point of even having age groups??

My daughter is quite upset because we don't feel she is ready to play up even though all her friends are.

The second part of the issue is... she SAYS she loooves softball but won't practice. She has played for 2 seasons and still cannot catch a ball or throw it really. She does great with grounders and can hit ok. She also has issues paying attention on the field.

All of this to say, we are worried she'd get hurt or feel like a failure in a higher level.. BUT now she feels left behind because all her friends are moving and she'll likely be the only 3rd grader in 8U..

Should I just move her up to be with her friends?? Thanks!

Don’t do it! Let her develop and learn at the younger age group. As far as not wanting to practice, that’s normal for that age group. You’re lucky to get 10 minutes of concentrating at that age level. As far as catching goes, why don’t you start with a four corner drill. Buy tennis balls and throw to her four corners- upper right, upper left, lower right, lower left. This develops her motor skills to catch. Make it a game with her. If she can catch so many in a row,take her for an ice cream or something she likes. What you’ll find is that she won’t view this as a practice at all. Once she surpasses the other girls’ skill level, then she’ll want practice more.


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Jul 31, 2015
761
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FWIW, I think she should play 10U with her friends, it's just too socially awkward to have a 3rd grader playing with kindergartners and 1st graders.

However...let her know that if she wants to play with her friends, she has to do x, y, and z.

Some examples of x y z:
x = catch with mom everyday indoors with marshmallows or socks or tennis balls for 5 mins
y = throw a softball up in the air and catch it for 3 mins per day, maybe while she lies in bed, before she goes to sleep
z = take "grounders" and "fly balls" in the house for a few mins every other day, practice throwing them back (use sponge balls or socks)

Or whatever other simple drill to remove her fear, get her used to tracking and catching, build her confidence.
Then when the weather warms up you can move outside and add in some hitting.

Doesn't have to be a set program, or more than a few mins per day, just make sure she's doing at least one small thing per day to get better.
So 10U is fun and safe.

Good luck!
 

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