High school softball

[ang2bmd]

This is simple. You and your DD feel ROTC is more important than softball. This is your priority. The coach feels softball is more important than ROTC his priority. My DD would never chose another activity over softball...her priority. All choices are individual and valid. All choices have consequences. Coaches choice is going to lose him a solid player. Your choice means she doesn't want to play softball anymore. This is OK she clearly loves and wants to do ROTC. More power to her and lots of luck in the future.

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[CoachJD]

This is simple. You and your DD feel ROTC is more important than softball. This is your priority. The coach feels softball is more important than ROTC his priority. My DD would never chose another activity over softball...her priority. All choices are individual and valid. All choices have consequences. Coaches choice is going to lose him a solid player. Your choice means she doesn't want to play softball anymore. This is OK she clearly loves and wants to do ROTC. More power to her and lots of luck in the future.

Agree with this, though we don't actually know what the punishment for missing practice is going to be. What if she just won't start one game? In that case, coach's choice shouldn't lose him a solid player because quitting over something like that would be ridiculous.

Of course, maybe the coach is actually unreasonable with the punishment. We haven't been told that yet.

 

[Rolling Hard]

This whole rant is about special treatment. You want your DD to skip practice and you want the coach to be ok with it. Your DD is busy. So is every other kid. If she wants to do the parade skip practice and take the consequences. If she doesn’t want to do that just go to practice.

That's horseshoot. Kids should be encouraged to participate in other activities (Band, Chess Club, ROTC, etc ). If a player has to miss a practice or 2 due to a conflict in schedules, specially in another school activity, there should be no consequences. I bet this type of coach would have a different policy if his number 1 and 2 pitchers were in the parade.

 

[clarity]

She emailed her coach to let him know about it and that she'd miss practice.

There's the problem right there. I did this in college once--told a professor that I would miss class because of an event. To teach me a lesson, the professor gave an extremely easy quiz to the class the day that I was gone. We then had the opportunity to talk about the proper way to handle it. Obviously I remembered.

 

[CMMom1740]

Yeah, the rule at our school was always "miss a practice/game, get benched for the next game." Although it has definitely been applied inconsistently since we got a new HC last year. We had a double-header on Saturday and DD missed the first game to take the ACT. And Coach let the same girl (freshman) catch both games, even though DD got there in plenty of time to get warmed up for the second game. Kind of ridiculous in the heat. Meanwhile, our stud 2B has missed three games to attend college camps and hasn't sat a single inning.

Find out what the penalty will be and then your DD needs to decide if she can live with it or not. Simple as that assuming HC will actually tell her.

 

[soonerfan1966]

It is funny that the older you get the less the little things matter. If missing a 30 minute individual practice is gonna make or break the team/player for another school activity that should tell you all you need to know about the coach.

 

[Rick M]

What if she just won't start one game? In that case, coach's choice shouldn't lose him a solid player because quitting over something like that would be ridiculous.

This was my reaction as well, but I’ll take it a step further. Nobody is playing softball because it’s going to lead to a lucrative career. The takeaways when our girls hang up the cleats are in building character, maturity, and personal responsibility.

Tell your daughter to go to the parade. She can tell the coach that she’s chosen to do so with the understanding that he has a team culture to maintain and that there will be consequences. Do not quit the team.

Pay the penance whatever it may be, and do so with enthusiasm. Life isn’t always fair, bosses won’t always have your best interests in mind, and true leaders accept the consequences of their actions while continuing to put forth their best effort.

If the punishment is anything more than a slap on the wrist, she can enjoy the view from the moral high ground.


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[CoachJD]

That's horseshoot. Kids should be encouraged to participate in other activities (Band, Chess Club, ROTC, etc ). If a player has to miss a practice or 2 due to a conflict in schedules, specially in another school activity, there should be no consequences. I bet this type of coach would have a different policy if his number 1 and 2 pitchers were in the parade.

Strong disagree with this.

Kids should be encouraged to participate in other activities, yes, but when you make a commitment for a season and are told that should be your priority, that needs to be your priority. This isn't a year-round team. HS ball is a short-term commitment. Nobody is saying she has to dedicate her entire life to the sport.

Why should every other school activity take priority (remember, choosing Activity A over Activity B means you're prioritizing Activity A)? And why should the coach just be OK with kids missing whenever something else comes up?

My policy is that softball comes first after academics (band is a class, which makes it academic). It's only a bad policy if you think it's fine to have 6 kids at practice because the rest of them found other school hobbies to take up their time everyday.

 

[bmakj]

Strong disagree with this.

Kids should be encouraged to participate in other activities, yes, but when you make a commitment for a season and are told that should be your priority, that needs to be your priority. This isn't a year-round team. HS ball is a short-term commitment. Nobody is saying she has to dedicate her entire life to the sport.

Why should every other school activity take priority (remember, choosing Activity A over Activity B means you're prioritizing Activity A)? And why should the coach just be OK with kids missing whenever something else comes up?

My policy is that softball comes first after academics (band is a class, which makes it academic). It's only a bad policy if you think it's fine to have 6 kids at practice because the rest of them found other school hobbies to take up their time everyday.

they did not prioritize ROTC over softball, it has been stated they have missed a lot of ROTC functions for softball, and thought this was a good chance to try to balance that, because the girl really wanted to do both. ADs and principals need to do a much better job of reigning in coaches like this, who have developed extreme tunnel vision. Admin should really have a meeting with all Coaches/Faculty leaders (ie club sponsors, etc.) several times a year, and remind them to all work together for the girls, and try to be reasonable and accommodating to each others activities. a 30 minute individual practice missed to participate in a civic event as a member of a different school based organization? No Brainer frankly. HCs like that need to reexamine why they are coaching. it is certainly not to help the girls at that point. what if X org was doing a fundraiser, and the student had to work it or not be allowed to particuiapte in X activity the fundraiser was to pay for?

and the HIGH SCHOOL coach who sat a girl for taking ACTs should have been relieved on the spot. Period, not even a discussion, he has completely lost his way, and forgotten that these are STUDENT AThletes.

lots of folks need to relearn the wisdom of Mr. Miyagi "balance in life"

 

[Rolling Hard]

Strong disagree with this.

Kids should be encouraged to participate in other activities, yes, but when you make a commitment for a season and are told that should be your priority, that needs to be your priority. This isn't a year-round team. HS ball is a short-term commitment. Nobody is saying she has to dedicate her entire life to the sport.

Why should every other school activity take priority (remember, choosing Activity A over Activity B means you're prioritizing Activity A)? And why should the coach just be OK with kids missing whenever something else comes up?

My policy is that softball comes first after academics (band is a class, which makes it academic). It's only a bad policy if you think it's fine to have 6 kids at practice because the rest of them found other school hobbies to take up their time everyday.

Nobody said everyday. Missing practice once or twice a season for a legit reason should be perfectly acceptable. If your two starting pitchers were in the parade you probably have to amend your policy.