High school softball

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Mar 4, 2015
526
93
New England
This is off topic but I want players at 90% of practices. If it falls below that I am not doing my job as a coach. What am I doing wrong that you do not want to be here?

The other 10% can be mental health break, big exam, birthday party, I do not care. They just need to let me know, I honestly do not care why.

Stupid kids and parents will lie to your face why they are missing practice anyways. Like I am not going to find the real reason eventual. So just tell me you are not coming as soon as you can, that is it. No penalty.

Also gives parent and player freedom that they do not have to be there any specific day.

I like this approach. Most HS teams practice too much anyway, IMO, especially those w/ a bunch of travel players. They're already playing year-round.
 
Aug 10, 2016
686
63
Georgia
OP here - rain held out and DD and her friend were able to march. They were about 1 hr late to practice - they warmed up and did some cages. After the regular practice ended, he had them stay for about an hour to do fungo and hitting. Not really a punishment I'd say. Got more one-on-one practice but 2 person fungo she says is really tiring since you don't have time to rest like normally.
They have games this week but looks like rain again so not sure if he'll sit her or not. (She did play in both of their games last week.) He did say thank you to me about getting them back to practice after.

I'm glad things seem to have worked out however.
 
Oct 11, 2010
8,337
113
Chicago, IL
We had a pitching a issue during school ball, no pitchers. HC said he'ld come to school early to work with anyone who wanted to try/ learn to pitch. Always respected that they were willing to work extra hours to make the Team better. They were not getting paid anymore.

Sounds like, whatever faults HC might have, he cares about the players and Team. Personally I will forgive for that sole reason.
 
Aug 9, 2021
216
43
OP here - rain held out and DD and her friend were able to march. They were about 1 hr late to practice - they warmed up and did some cages. After the regular practice ended, he had them stay for about an hour to do fungo and hitting. Not really a punishment I'd say. Got more one-on-one practice but 2 person fungo she says is really tiring since you don't have time to rest like normally.
They have games this week but looks like rain again so not sure if he'll sit her or not. (She did play in both of their games last week.) He did say thank you to me about getting them back to practice after.

I'm glad things seem to have worked out however.
Glad it worked out. Amazing how much in life, not just softball, gets resolved relatively easily with nothing more than effective communication. Yet that seems to be elusive in much of life as well.
 
Jan 8, 2019
664
93
Glad it worked out. Amazing how much in life, not just softball, gets resolved relatively easily with nothing more than effective communication. Yet that seems to be elusive in much of life as well.
"Communication is the problem to the answer."
from The Things We Do for Love
by 10cc (1976)

 
Jun 6, 2016
2,714
113
Chicago
Say @CoachJD , I believe you are a High School coach?......If so, what is your penalty for missing a practice for a reason you do not feel legit?.....Does everyone know what it is?.....Is it, miss a practice, miss game? You write it means to you "loss of playing time".....So if your superstar misses practice she may miss a game, (maybe not even that) but thats it, and if your #8 player misses a practice, she's done for the year? If she's a bench player, she may as well quit because she's never seeing the field?........Simply put, what is your definition of "Loss of playing time"?

Here's what players/parents get every year. It's been tweaked over the years. This was last year's:

Team meetings, practices, and games are mandatory, and failure to attend may result in suspension from playing in future games up to dismissal from the team. All punishment is subject to the coaches’ discretion.
  • An unexcused absence from practice will result in a loss of playing time.
  • A second unexcused absence from practice will result in a one-game suspension. Students will be expected to attend all subsequent practices before that game, and they will travel with the team to support their teammates at the game.
  • An unexcused absence from a game will result in a one-game suspension. Students will be expected to attend and participate in all practices before that game, and they will travel with the team to support their teammates at the game.
  • Multiple infractions can result in additional punishment, up to and including dismissal from the team.

I don't think there's anything unreasonable in there, but yes, I do make it clear some punishment is up to the discretion of the coaches. That's largely because it's impossible to account for every scenario in a document like this. I'm also struggling to come up with some examples of prior punishment because there just haven't been many instances of unexcused absences. Very, very generally, a starter won't start. A bench player probably won't play at all, unless there's some emergency. Though I have put girls in at the very end of blowouts even if they probably shouldn't have played.

I have had a couple instances of unexcused absences from games. In one case, and I forget the details, the team absolutely needed one girl to play. So she did. Then she sat the following game. This season, we had a girl miss 3-4 games because her family just went on a vacation in the middle of the school year (this was not even over spring break). Her dad did tell me a few weeks in advance, and it wasn't really her fault, but she still sat a game when she got back. Only one. I considered missing all those games to be a single infraction. Coaches' discretion.

What I think you (and others here) are missing is just how difficult it is to get everybody -- players and parents -- on board at many high schools. In fact, other sports at our school have a huge problem with this, and it is a direct result of coaches not having rules like this (our first boys soccer game of the year was played 9 on 11 because the boys have zero accountability, so sometimes they just don't show up). You see one girl who wants to miss practice one time for one thing. I see 25 girls who want to miss practice 25 times for 25 different things, and then 25 complaints about how it's not fair that one of the others gets to miss but she doesn't (when, in fact, she probably did for a different thing). A team absolutely cannot function that way.

Lest you think I'm some kind of monster who demands too much of my players: I'm holding our first open field of the school year tomorrow. They are, by rule, optional (and optional truly means optional for me). I've already told our players they're not allowed to attend if they have volleyball/cross country commitments. I want them to do other things, but I'd be pissed if someone missed a practice during our season to attend some optional event for another activity.
 
Last edited:
Aug 19, 2015
1,118
113
Atlanta, GA
Here's what players/parents get every year. It's been tweaked over the years. This was last year's:



I don't think there's anything unreasonable in there, but yes, I do make it clear some punishment is up to the discretion of the coaches. That's largely because it's impossible to account for every scenario in a document like this. I'm also struggling to come up with some examples of prior punishment because there just haven't been many instances of unexcused absences. Very, very generally, a starter won't start. A bench player probably won't play at all, unless there's some emergency. Though I have put girls in at the very end of blowouts even if they probably shouldn't have played.

I have had a couple instances of unexcused absences from games. In one case, and I forget the details, the team absolutely needed one girl to play. So she did. Then she sat the following game. This season, we had a girl miss 3-4 games because her family just went on a vacation in the middle of the school year (this was not even over spring break). Her dad did tell me a few weeks in advance, and it wasn't really her fault, but she still sat a game when she got back. Only one. I considered missing all those games to be a single infraction. Coaches' discretion.

What I think you (and others here) are missing is just how difficult it is to get everybody -- players and parents -- on board at many high schools. In fact, other sports at our school have a huge problem with this, and it is a direct result of coaches not having rules like this (our first boys soccer game of the year was played 9 on 11 because the boys have zero accountability, so sometimes they just don't show up). You see one girl who wants to miss practice one time for one thing. I see 25 girls who want to miss practice 25 times for 25 different things, and then 25 complaints about how it's not fair that one of the others gets to miss but she doesn't (when, in fact, she probably did for a different thing). A team absolutely cannot function that way.

Lest you think I'm some kind of monster who demands too much of my players: I'm holding our first open field of the school year tomorrow. They are, by rule, optional (and optional truly means optional for me). I've already told our players they're not allowed to attend if they have volleyball/cross country commitments. I want them to do other things, but I'd be pissed if someone missed a practice during our season to attend some optional event for another activity.
Question: How do you define "unexcused" absences? Sounds like an obvious question, but it's not necessarily. What about illness? What about quarantine because the player has been contact traced? What about attendance at other events such as college recruitment camps? And what types of absences will you excuse; personal vacations, days to visit college campuses (whether for softball camps or just a general campus tour)?
 
Aug 25, 2019
1,066
113
Here's what players/parents get every year. It's been tweaked over the years. This was last year's:



I don't think there's anything unreasonable in there, but yes, I do make it clear some punishment is up to the discretion of the coaches. That's largely because it's impossible to account for every scenario in a document like this. I'm also struggling to come up with some examples of prior punishment because there just haven't been many instances of unexcused absences. Very, very generally, a starter won't start. A bench player probably won't play at all, unless there's some emergency. Though I have put girls in at the very end of blowouts even if they probably shouldn't have played.

I have had a couple instances of unexcused absences from games. In one case, and I forget the details, the team absolutely needed one girl to play. So she did. Then she sat the following game. This season, we had a girl miss 3-4 games because her family just went on a vacation in the middle of the school year (this was not even over spring break). Her dad did tell me a few weeks in advance, and it wasn't really her fault, but she still sat a game when she got back. Only one. I considered missing all those games to be a single infraction. Coaches' discretion.

What I think you (and others here) are missing is just how difficult it is to get everybody -- players and parents -- on board at many high schools. In fact, other sports at our school have a huge problem with this, and it is a direct result of coaches not having rules like this (our first boys soccer game of the year was played 9 on 11 because the boys have zero accountability, so sometimes they just don't show up). You see one girl who wants to miss practice one time for one thing. I see 25 girls who want to miss practice 25 times for 25 different things, and then 25 complaints about how it's not fair that one of the others gets to miss but she doesn't (when, in fact, she probably did for a different thing). A team absolutely cannot function that way.

Lest you think I'm some kind of monster who demands too much of my players: I'm holding our first open field of the school year tomorrow. They are, by rule, optional (and optional truly means optional for me). I've already told our players they're not allowed to attend if they have volleyball/cross country commitments. I want them to do other things, but I'd be pissed if someone missed a practice during our season to attend some optional event for another activity.
Right on @CoachJD, thanks for responding. But the "Loss of Playing time" which is up to you is still bothering me. Not softball, but when DD played field hockey, that coach gave the similiar speech. There was a long weekend where a few girls missed a game and two practices. When they came back, the coach put them right back starting the next game because they were the top players. I wanted to go away that weekend, but DD, who wasn't a starter but was first off the bench, pleaded with us not to go since she would miss playing time, and then we saw what happened when the top players returned, somewhat disheartening.

While you have every right as coach to leave it up to your discretion, it's definitely a bad look when the top players get preferential treatment over others who are not. Everyone notices it.
 
Last edited:
Jun 20, 2015
848
93
the biggest knock that I have with any of this is when the coach announces whatever the rules are for the program, but then doesn't apply them equally to their {obvious to all}, favorites.

Example, years ago, I sat right in the parent and player meeting early in the school year, and like everyone else hear and read that all players needed to provide their own spikes and that they must be black and white. PERIOD. Fast forward to Spring season and all but 2 of the coaches obvious favorites have black spikes, the 2 wearing some obnoxious white / gold shoes. Nothing was ever done. And trust me in wasn't a finance issue as to why they could not follow the rule for spikes.

OR the announcement that the only excuses to miss games during spring break in March were for approved academic reasons. Band trip, ETC. And specifically spelled out family vacations ARE NOT APPROVED ABSENCES. Further more, every game missed is a game a player will sit. Well, spring break comes around, and several favorite minions miss 3-5 games due to family vacations. And NEVER SAT A SINGLE GAME!!!! AND other girls that went on a band trip to NYC were sat games equal to what they missed. So much for a rules and following them.
 

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