H.S. Parent Follows Ump into Parking Lot

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May 29, 2019
269
63
DD had a varsity high school game last night. It was a pretty close game through the first few innings, then we broke it open. Ended up winning 17-5, or something close to that. Things were pretty calm, except for the belligerent parent for the opposing (home) team that got louder and louder about his displeasure with the umps strike zone. He must have been the pitcher’s dad. The ump did seem to have a tight zone, but was definitely consistent both ways. I never heard either coach chirp about the strike zone.

Fast forward to after the game, and I notice that still belligerent parent B-lining to the parking lot with that familiar “I’m a pissed off obese person waddle” yelling about the umpire. Ironically, he was parked right next to the ump. Parent immediately pop’s his hatch back open and is shuffling through his stuff, yelling at the ump the whole time, while the ump is trying to change his gear and get the heck out of there ASAP. You could see that the ump (probably in his 70s) was intimidated and visually “shaken”. He called the other ump over and asked if could “keep an eye on me”, which he did. Now, I saw this whole thing playing out from the beginning, so instead of waiting for my DD to tell her good job, something in my head told me to go to the parking lot to incase “something stupid” happened. It was small parking lot, and the two umps, belligerent parent, any myself were the only four people there at the time. I walked up about 20 feet away from their position and postured myself to where it was obvious that my entire purpose was to be a witness to their confrontation. I think I took the 2nd ump by surprise as he started to stare me down with that “what the heck” look. I gave him a wink and nod to let him know that I had no ill intent towards them. Belligerent parent then noticed me and gave me a stare down too, to which I stared back. He then turns back to the ump and starts yelling, “I never threatened you…NO! I never threatened you. I just had to tell you what a bad job you did!” Parent gave me another stare then started walking away. Plate ump is now changed out of his gear, and then peels out of the parking lot. 2nd ump asks me “What’s the deal with that guy?” to which I reply, “I don’t know, I’m a parent with the opposing team. It looked something stupid might happen so I thought that if there was a witness, that might diffuse the situation.” To which he thanked me. I then told him they umped a good game, and that I would not want to be an ump because of parents like that. He thanked me again, then also said that the plate ump was an idiot too. o_O

I was going to let this whole thing drop, but the more I think about it, I am wondering if I should report this parent to the other teams Athletic Director? It’s one thing to chirp in the stands about a call, but I think that following an ump to the parking lot after the game is WAY over the line. Did I prevent a physical altercation? I don't know. I’m not going to say that he went out the parking lot to physically beat the ump up, but you never know how things can escalate. I definitely think he went out there to at least verbally intimidate the guy. There is no place for that! So, should I report the guy, or let it drop?
 
May 29, 2019
269
63
DD had a varsity high school game last night. It was a pretty close game through the first few innings, then we broke it open. Ended up winning 17-5, or something close to that. Things were pretty calm, except for the belligerent parent for the opposing (home) team that got louder and louder about his displeasure with the umps strike zone. He must have been the pitcher’s dad. The ump did seem to have a tight zone, but was definitely consistent both ways. I never heard either coach chirp about the strike zone.

Fast forward to after the game, and I notice that still belligerent parent B-lining to the parking lot with that familiar “I’m a pissed off obese person waddle” yelling about the umpire. Ironically, he was parked right next to the ump. Parent immediately pop’s his hatch back open and is shuffling through his stuff, yelling at the ump the whole time, while the ump is trying to change his gear and get the heck out of there ASAP. You could see that the ump (probably in his 70s) was intimidated and visually “shaken”. He called the other ump over and asked if could “keep an eye on me”, which he did. Now, I saw this whole thing playing out from the beginning, so instead of waiting for my DD to tell her good job, something in my head told me to go to the parking lot to incase “something stupid” happened. It was small parking lot, and the two umps, belligerent parent, any myself were the only four people there at the time. I walked up about 20 feet away from their position and postured myself to where it was obvious that my entire purpose was to be a witness to their confrontation. I think I took the 2nd ump by surprise as he started to stare me down with that “what the heck” look. I gave him a wink and nod to let him know that I had no ill intent towards them. Belligerent parent then noticed me and gave me a stare down too, to which I stared back. He then turns back to the ump and starts yelling, “I never threatened you…NO! I never threatened you. I just had to tell you what a bad job you did!” Parent gave me another stare then started walking away. Plate ump is now changed out of his gear, and then peels out of the parking lot. 2nd ump asks me “What’s the deal with that guy?” to which I reply, “I don’t know, I’m a parent with the opposing team. It looked something stupid might happen so I thought that if there was a witness, that might diffuse the situation.” To which he thanked me. I then told him they umped a good game, and that I would not want to be an ump because of parents like that. He thanked me again, then also said that the plate ump was an idiot too.

I was going to let this whole thing drop, but the more I think about it, I am wondering if I should report this parent to the other teams Athletic Director? It’s one thing to chirp in the stands about a call, but I think that following an ump to the parking lot after the game is WAY over the line. Did I prevent a physical altercation? I don't know. I’m not going to say that he went out the parking lot to physically beat the ump up, but you never know how things can escalate. I definitely think he went out there to at least verbally intimidate the guy. There is no place for that! So, should I report the guy, or let it drop?
For the "TL: DR" people...nothing happened. :ROFLMAO: But may report an unruly parent.
 
Jul 12, 2019
32
18
DD had a varsity high school game last night. It was a pretty close game through the first few innings, then we broke it open.

I was going to let this whole thing drop, but the more I think about it, I am wondering if I should report this parent to the other teams Athletic Director? So, should I report the guy, or let it drop?
That wasn't the first time he was overly passionate about a softball game and it won't be the last. I'd email the coach, AD, Principal and your school's AD and principal and let then know that you feel that it's potentially dangerous to play that team unless...
 
Jun 6, 2016
2,714
113
Chicago
During my preseason player/parent meeting, I address the idea of being this parent. Every coach does, I'm sure, but the one thing I tell them is that nobody there may know who you are. The umpire probably doesn't know which kid is yours. But your kid knows. You kid hears your voice and I can promise you it doesn't make her play better.

My guess is this girl would love it if her dad were benched for a few games so he could reflect on his behavior. I think it's a good idea to make a call. Hopefully the other school asks him to not come for a while. That's probably what's best for everybody involved.
 
Aug 25, 2019
1,066
113
During my preseason player/parent meeting, I address the idea of being this parent. Every coach does, I'm sure, but the one thing I tell them is that nobody there may know who you are. The umpire probably doesn't know which kid is yours. But your kid knows. You kid hears your voice and I can promise you it doesn't make her play better.

My guess is this girl would love it if her dad were benched for a few games so he could reflect on his behavior. I think it's a good idea to make a call. Hopefully the other school asks him to not come for a while. That's probably what's best for everybody involved.
Have you had parents like this on your team? How did you handle it?
 
Jun 6, 2016
2,714
113
Chicago
Have you had parents like this on your team? How did you handle it?

No, nothing like this. Our 10u parents will occasionally get a little loud, but it's typical overexcited 10u parent stuff. I have had to tell them all to chill out once or twice last year, but a lot of that was them reacting to the parents of another team (new team to the league, not a bunch of nice people).

I guess the worst beyond that is a former player whose dad was just loud. He rarely was disruptive or disrespectful, but you could hear him yelling from the outfield, and I think his presence made his daughter worse. That same girl had a grandfather (mother's dad) who was not loud, but very annoying. One time he actually walked into the dugout to give some sort of sage advice. He meant well, but he was a little much to deal with.
 

Cannonball

Ex "Expert"
Feb 25, 2009
4,855
113
Umpires in my area would have contacted the AD or HC right away. At my school, they would then come before the school board to be banned from athletic activities. I've had this done a couple of times to parents who got out of control. We cover this in the parent meeting and our AD has a school-wide parent meeting where this is covered.
 

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