Do Players Accept Criticism?

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Jun 8, 2016
16,118
113
So you can't just tell a player to trust that their coach is only trying to make you better. Coaches have to prove it over time. They have to earn that trust. Once players trust that you genuinely care about them, they'll tolerate more firmness.
This is important, especially with youngish females. Develop a re pore and some trust and then it will be a lot easier to be hard on them
when you have to. DD's current coach is great with that. He had a daughter who played in college and has been coaching for a while and
you can see he knows this. He lets them mess around with him, tease him etc but when he needs to be hard on them he is.
 

radness

Possibilities & Opportunities!
Dec 13, 2019
7,270
113
A Friends husband has some really well thought out good conversation points...
Except, His delivery makes others angry.
And he's got a
will kick yer azz kinda look on his face.
Always see others back down from conversation with him.
One time i said
Let me give you a hug while i reply so you know what its like to not have to overwelm others to make a point.
He hugged me back and said
I get it!

Approach is possibly more important than the critique!
 
Nov 20, 2020
995
93
SW Missouri
Should the question be? Can the parent of the player accept criticism of their DD?

I think it’s both questions.

Can you (as a player) accept criticism?

and

Can the parent(s) accept the criticism?

I’ve seen first hand a player not fix or work on certain issues because the parents nullify the criticism from the coaching staff.
 
Jun 1, 2015
500
43
I’ve seen first hand a player not fix or work on certain issues because the parents nullify the criticism from the coaching staff.
^^^ THIS. It's amazing how many players won't do something they know is going to make their game better just because mom or dad don't like the fact the coach is straightforward (albeit can be gruff or a bit blunt on his remarks) about things that have to change.

It's also not surprising how often I've seen players not do something BECAUSE their parents told them to do it. I've had a couple of instances during the season where I've had to (calmly) tell players privately (on the field/during a timeout, etc), "Your parents can have their opinions, but ultimately I'm the one coaching you and doing what I can to help you improve. Focus on what I say and how I adjust you and less on them, and I'll handle them if I need to." USUALLY this works, especially with the younger/middle-aged players (12U/14U). Older players (16Us) should already be doing what they need to do without being told.
 

radness

Possibilities & Opportunities!
Dec 13, 2019
7,270
113
Use a filter when listening to feedback. It helps in more than one way. To not get offended and take it personally, and to recognize a person is trying to help regardless of their approach.
In that way the filter can help assess that~
Sometimes criticism is simply a notation another person has made and they are simply sharing.
Othertimes criticism comes from people who only want things done 'their' way.
Which may not be helpful to you but is insight toward another,
and is still valuable...but gets stored in the brain in a different place. ;)
 
Last edited:
Apr 20, 2018
4,581
113
SoCal
^^^ THIS. It's amazing how many players won't do something they know is going to make their game better just because mom or dad don't like the fact the coach is straightforward (albeit can be gruff or a bit blunt on his remarks) about things that have to change.

It's also not surprising how often I've seen players not do something BECAUSE their parents told them to do it. I've had a couple of instances during the season where I've had to (calmly) tell players privately (on the field/during a timeout, etc), "Your parents can have their opinions, but ultimately I'm the one coaching you and doing what I can to help you improve. Focus on what I say and how I adjust you and less on them, and I'll handle them if I need to." USUALLY this works, especially with the younger/middle-aged players (12U/14U). Older players (16Us) should already be doing what they need to do without being told.
Could you sight a couple of examples of what you are describing? What are you adjusting? How do you know the parents are telling the players not to listening to you?
 

radness

Possibilities & Opportunities!
Dec 13, 2019
7,270
113
Could you sight a couple of examples of what you are describing? What are you adjusting? How do you know the parents are telling the players not to listening to you?
That kinda sounds like the situation where parents say
' just listen respectfully and let it go out the other ear'
 

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