Dealing with high school coaches.

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Oct 26, 2019
1,375
113
Have your daughter talk to the coach. Going to the Athletic Director or principal will probably not end well. Neither of them are responsible for the lineup. They are only responsible for hiring the coach. If the coach has been there for 20 years or more she is unlikely to be fired because you think your daughter should be playing.

She is also just a freshman and has four years ahead of her. Some coaches are pretty set on playing the upperclassman because they feel they have earned it. Don’t mess it up before your daughter has that opportunity.
 
Jun 27, 2021
418
63
"She is an average player, she has been playing softball since she was 8, plays travel and is a pitcher/outfielder." This line stuck out to me as you also said the team is terrible. Have her talk to the coach to see where she needs to improve but also maybe look at the things she is doing and who she is doing them (personal coaches, hitting, pitching, etc. )with to see why you believe she is an "average player" after all these years of playing travel.
 
Nov 25, 2016
39
8
Have your daughter talk to the coach. Going to the Athletic Director or principal will probably not end well. Neither of them are responsible for the lineup. They are only responsible for hiring the coach. If the coach has been there for 20 years or more she is unlikely to be fired because you think your daughter should be playing.

She is also just a freshman and has four years ahead of her. Some coaches are pretty set on playing the upperclassman because they feel they have earned it. Don’t mess it up before your daughter has that opportunity.
It is more like she picks favorites, there are seniors sitting the bench who are better than some of ones that are playing. Also there is 1 freshman starter, she deserves it, it just so happens my daughter plays the same position as the coaches daughter and a senior who's parent is highly involved with the boosters.

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Nov 25, 2016
39
8
"She is an average player, she has been playing softball since she was 8, plays travel and is a pitcher/outfielder." This line stuck out to me as you also said the team is terrible. Have her talk to the coach to see where she needs to improve but also maybe look at the things she is doing and who she is doing them (personal coaches, hitting, pitching, etc. )with to see why you believe she is an "average player" after all these years of playing travel.
Not everyone is a super star and there is such thing as humility. She is a very above average pitcher and tops on her travel team, it just so happens the starting pitcher is better than her. She is an average travel ball player, on this team she is starting 9 worthy and compared to the kids starting over her she is a superstar.

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Jun 27, 2021
418
63
Not everyone is a super star and there is such thing as humility. She is a very above average pitcher and tops on her travel team, it just so happens the starting pitcher is better than her. She is an average travel ball player, on this team she is starting 9 worthy and compared to the kids starting over her she is a superstar.

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Just using your words. After my daughters freshman year she chose to go in a different direction with her pitching coach because she felt she "plateaued' although she had a pretty successful first year based on end of the year accolades. And her HS team was/is loaded. But sometimes the best thing is to get new eyes on you.
 
Nov 25, 2016
39
8
Just using your words. After my daughters freshman year she chose to go in a different direction with her pitching coach because she felt she "plateaued' although she had a pretty successful first year based on end of the year accolades. And her HS team was/is loaded. But sometimes the best thing is to get new eyes on you.
Thanks for your feedback. I can see what you are saying.

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Oct 1, 2014
2,219
113
USA
I would speak with the AD or principal (whomever is in charge of hiring/firing) the coach and just mention the above. I wouldn't go into the other details unless you are asked.

Short of that you are out of options.
Do you honestly believe there won't be other questions? Of course there will and most likely the parent will answer.
 
Oct 1, 2014
2,219
113
USA
A Coach in High School (any sport) should not be allowed to have a "No Communication" policy. Certain issues can be "off limits" for discussion but that blanket statement is chicken scratch. Teachers/Coaches/Administration can not be allowed to do this no matter how much they may dislike dealing with kids or parents. Force the issue, don't reinforce the problem. If they think they are that important/powerful/busy then they need to be brought back to reality.
 
Nov 25, 2016
39
8
Update:. The day after getting embarrassed in a loss 12-1, with 6 errors, 3 by the coaches daughter (who finally she decided didn't deserve to hit). I pull up to practice to pick up my daughter and the entire Varsity and JV team are sitting in the grass watching the middle school game! As it turns out they practiced for 45 minutes and spent the remaining hour watching the middle school play. The coach said, "it's important to support them"

I get it, these kids will eventually be playing in high school etc. But after such a terrible loss, I would expect them to have been working on the things they were deficient on in the last game.

Is this ridiculous or am I just being over analyzing due to my emotions?

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Mar 4, 2015
526
93
New England
I would speak with the AD or principal (whomever is in charge of hiring/firing) the coach and just mention the above. I wouldn't go into the other details unless you are asked.

I can't imagine that an AD is going to do anything unless there are allegations of abuse of misconduct. That would open up the AD to second-guessing and parent complaints for 20+ sports.
 

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