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18u talking to coach

Oct 11, 2010
Chicago, IL
Younger then yours but DD had an Issue with her school Team that last too long. I finally told her that she had just 2 choices. She talks to coach or I will. She talked to the coach next practice and Issue sort of resolved which was good enough for us.
Jun 27, 2018
She plays. They play a showcase schedule so they rotate in and out and frequently change positions. They were told though if they go into an elimination tournament the best 9 were playing. I told her not to let that worry her. Just play your game and relax. I honestly don’t see her going to a tournament and completely not playing at all. I really think coach is trying to push them in that regard. I told her I don’t think she was necessarily being targeted by that statement. She had some anxiety issues at 14u. She really is doing much better managing that now though. That’s why she was going to try and nip it in the bud but honestly she’s just decided to stay quiet now and work through. I swear I could write a book after this is all done.

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May 10, 2019
Do you all think it’s ok if an 18u player has a talk with the coach and ask her to maybe be a little more positive and have some faith? The negative is wearing her down mentally and she’s questioning if she should say something now or ride it out and finish the season, and say nothing. Not sure about this because I can see it going bad or good. She’s open to criticism, and really wants to please the coaches but she wants to say “maybe throw a little positive in there sometimes” because she feels like coach doesn’t value her. Or does she just say nothing and build her mental toughness. She feels her teammates value her though. Her and another girl are new to the team and they seem to be the ones coach is focusing some negativity on. Maybe she’s trying to break them in on her style.

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If the players is not responding positively to what the coach is doing, isn't it the coach's job to do what is bext for the player. Not all athletes perform better by being berated all the time. Especially athletes today. They need praise and they need it often. JMO. Old style coaches are done. They can't coach the same way they used to.
Jun 22, 2019
Yes it is more than OK for a player to talk to a coach about something that is bothering her. Communication between coach and player is very important. Your DD needs to learn how to approach adults and have adult conversations with them. What better way to do that than with her coach. What's the worst that could happen?
100% agree. As long as it is a mature conversation, it will be helpful for both.
Apr 20, 2018
Coaches never need to berate. I think it would be helpful to better understanding these situation knowing exactly was said, at what volume, and how often.
If a coach raises his voice a little and call DD over for some extra constructive instruction and says something like "you need to work on staying down and working thru the ball." And the player is hearing, " you suck and your afraid of the ball and until you fix it you aren't playing."
The faster old school, berating,, intimidating,, fearmongering coaches go the way of the dodo the better.

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