Commitment issues/overextended kids

[dbronstein]

Most 10U leagues have rules that everybody bats and everybody must play certain innings on defense.

I think the farthest I would go would be to say that players who tend to make all practices will tend to bat higher up in the order and play the "better" positions (ie. infield) more often. You're not "punishing" anybody, but "rewarding" the players who do make most of the practices.

This is what I did. These conflicts with other activities drive me crazy, but it's part of rec ball. I stated very clearly at the parents meeting at the first practice, and continually repeated it to the girls during practices, that the girls who came to practice and worked hard would get more time at their favorite positions and bat higher in the order. The girls seemed to understand and never complained, and I never heard a word from a parent complaining about playing time.

I tracked where everyone played every game including how many innings they were on the bench (I used Excel, but Rick's chart is pretty cool) and how many PAs everyone got. Everyone got some time at their preferred positions, and the PAs on a per-game average were pretty even.

 

[CMMom1740]

Coaches,

I'm brand new to this forum and I thank you in advance for any advice or opinions. I am coaching a 10U rec team in upstate NY and I have a situation I could use some advice on. I have a few kids on my team with commitments outside of softball (dance, chorus, etc). Am I wrong to expect commitment from the girls on my team? I have already had parents messaging me about Suzy will have to miss practice on this day for reason X and Jill will miss this day Y reason...I made a comment at my first practice about how the kids that show up every day and put in the work are the ones that are going to get the most game time. I don't see it as fair for a full time participant to have to give up game time for part timers who think other activities are more important. I had a parent approach me at a school function just today trying to convince me (with his 20+ years of coaching experience) that I can't punish kids for missing practice because they don't have a choice in the matter. As if little Suzy didn't ask to sign up for dance and then two weeks later ask to sign up for softball.

I am asking if I am in the wrong by expecting the girls on my roster to be committed to the team and show up for all practices and games and to reduce playing time for those girls that are not committed to the team.

Thanks.

I just think that asking 10-year olds to commit to one and only one activity is too much. At that age, they're still experimenting with different things and deciding what they like. And this is rec, not travel. I think you need to reset your expectations. No offense, but that's just a little too intense.

 

[JStar00]

This is what I did. These conflicts with other activities drive me crazy, but it's part of rec ball. I stated very clearly at the parents meeting at the first practice, and continually repeated it to the girls during practices, that the girls who came to practice and worked hard would get more time at their favorite positions and bat higher in the order. The girls seemed to understand and never complained, and I never heard a word from a parent complaining about playing time.

I tracked where everyone played every game including how many innings they were on the bench (I used Excel, but Rick's chart is pretty cool) and how many PAs everyone got. Everyone got some time at their preferred positions, and the PAs on a per-game average were pretty even.

We usually play doubleheaders; I usually play my "starting lineup" in Game 1, then flip-flop it in game 2. Therefore the plate appearances should even out, although as the season wears on, the "starters" tend to creep ahead a bit in PAs, because our Game 2's are often called by darkness. Sometimes I completely reverse the order for a few games, start at No. 5-6-7 or something.

On defense, I usually play a "starting lineup" the first couple innings, then rotate people in from the outfield.

Pitchers and catchers are animals all to themselves. By the time you get to 12U (and 14U this year) you're done with people who just want to mess around pitching or catching.

Our No. 1 pitcher and catcher are by far the best athletes on the team. I switch them off to SS or CF.

Our No. 2 and 3 pitchers are not great athletes; they are big and strong and husky types. They go to 1B or LF when they're not pitching.

 

[robertc3]

Missing rec. for other activities and commitments is part of the rec. experience. If they are not at practice, be it for a school concert, a travel soccer game, or a friend's birthday party, that is just how it goes. On my son's rec team I don't consider practice or game attendance at all when setting the lineup. The boys signed up to play baseball, not watch others play baseball. The kids need to have a diverse experience at this and any age. I coach a 16u TB team and if a player misses practice for a band concert, misses a fall tournament game for high school soccer, or whatever other acceptable conflict may happen there is zero impact on her playing time. We are very clear about what are acceptable conflicts and what are unacceptable conflicts. But even when they miss for an unacceptable reason the consequences are usually pretty minor. We had a girl who missed a travel tournament so she could go to homecoming and the consequence was that she sat for one game the next tournament.

Kids need to have a full childhood. Softball, while important and very fun, is just one part of their life. Lest anyone thing we are just a glorified rec. team, we are very successful at 16A. The girls all have their heads screwed on right and are committed to the team. They don't abuse our policies and work incredibly hard to contribute to the team.

 

[Hawkeyes]

It's 10U rec. My philosophy is simple. We will work with whomever is there. We all have commitments outside of this. Right now i have kids coming and going because of soccer. Great, go play soccer. There soccer season will finish before our first game. Soccer is awesome for kids. I cant expect a parent to leave a child home from a weekend trip for a Saturday morning 10u practice.

I remind myself frequently that i have a better chance of losing a state championship at this age that win one. Get them excited to play and want to get better. Hopefully that pays off down the road

 

[AnnonymousCoach]

I have a couple of slightly overextended kids on my new 10U travel team, but for the most part it isn't a problem. We try to work around schedules as much as possible and once in a while a kid will miss a practice or a game and we deal with it. My team is a brand new team in our local organization where all but one or two are coming straight from a rec program because we had some many want to play travel ball we were able to form two teams for two different divisions. I explained, in detail, at the parent meeting before practices started, what the monetary and time commitment would be for the team and for the most part it's been okay.

But I have one player that does drive me crazy. Softball is always the last priority for her. She misses at least half of practices or is late because of other things. When asked for dates that were bad for the season when attempting to schedule games, I got back every Friday and most of the Saturdays in May (MAY! Peak softball season here!) It wasn't physically possible for me to schedule around all of the conflicts. Yet she doesn't understand why she doesn't get as many chances at the primo positions as the girls that are here every practice. She was scheduled to start at pitcher our last game and while I think I'm reasonable to ask the girls to get there a half hour before the game to get ready, she was there MAYBE 10 minutes before the game start, and was putting her uniform on in the parking lot because she was coming from something else. It's not possible to get warm or mentally ready in that time frame so I went with a different pitcher.

If I was 100% honest, I'm not sure I would have extended an invitation to this player had I known the lack of commitment ahead of time. She was coming from another town and had a good tryout so I didn't have the info.


In rec ball, I coach who ever is there and everyone gets a chance to play every position. If you want to try pitching, I'll throw you out there for an inning (usually with a warning to the other coach that it's a newbie, but they know and will do the same for me.) But I'm also keeping my eye out on who is showing up, who isn't, who really wants to play, and relay that to the travel coaches if/when a girl is ready to try to "move up" to a higher level of ball.

 

[Gags]

Question for the original poster (OP) Eric1371 (if we didn't scare him away) - any follow-up thoughts? Anything posted here worth using going forward?

 

[dbronstein]

I just think that asking 10-year olds to commit to one and only one activity is too much. At that age, they're still experimenting with different things and deciding what they like. And this is rec, not travel. I think you need to reset your expectations. No offense, but that's just a little too intense.

My spin on this is that it is reasonable to expect them to fully commit to whatever activity they are doing for that season or session. You can't do everything. If softball and band are going to have a lot of conflicts, then you need to pick one. Besides not making a commitment to your teammates and coaches, you might be taking a spot away from someone who really wants to play and would be fully committed.

The caveat is if you talk to the coach up front and they agree to the limitations.

 

[CMMom1740]

My spin on this is that it is reasonable to expect them to fully commit to whatever activity they are doing for that season or session. You can't do everything. If softball and band are going to have a lot of conflicts, then you need to pick one. Besides not making a commitment to your teammates and coaches, you might be taking a spot away from someone who really wants to play and would be fully committed.

The caveat is if you talk to the coach up front and they agree to the limitations.

Agreed for 16 year olds. Can't sign onto that philosophy for 10-year olds. YMMV.

 

[dbronstein]

Agreed for 16 year olds. Can't sign onto that philosophy for 10-year olds. YMMV.

I think a big part of sports, even in 10U rec, is learning about commitment. It's one thing to miss an occasional practice or game, it's another to sign up for an activity knowing you're only going to be there half the time. We'll have to agree to disagree.